Bereavement time

[QUOTE=bright sparks;85968]Regardless of the parents situation and circumstances, her bad attitude, blatant rudeness and disrespect are completely unacceptable. She could have absolutely got her point across to the OP of difficulties in finding alternative care in a much nicer way, although how inappropriate and selfish to make this all about her. Suck it up, figure it out. These are exceptional circumstances and the OP is actually doing her a favour by forwarning her of what's to come which most people don't have the ability to know. Also after the fact that this parent said what she did and in the manner she did, nobody would have my sensitivity towards their situation.

I don't have anything in my contract, I'd take it unpaid because I have a contract that states if I close for any reason then the parents don't pay. It is irrelevant what an agencies policies are unless you are signed up with an agency"

You are absolutely right, clients like this one should not have our empathy. I used to think absolutely like that. Until I become aware of certain kind of psychological conditions. And I do not know the scientific names for those, there are people that are emotions less, their brains can not read others emotions therefore can not feel or act with empathy, some also suffer from the condition of saying things without thinking or not thinking of how this will affect the other person, it is all rooted in their brain. Or also makes you think how this person was raised as a child sadly to say, maybe was emotion less, sometimes it can also be rooted in their childhood.

Us as caregivers, we have to deal with all this kind of issues. We never know. But working in this field makes us more resilient.

I'm sorry if I posted an agency policy and my husband's work, I thought you were looking for a comparison or guidance on what others do in this kind of situation. It was mentioned that in a centre is three days.

Just an update on my client who was being difficult about me taking time off when my dad died.
So he died just before the weekend, and I continued to work through my day just hours after finding out he died(didn't feel it was enough lead time to give my clients notice of closure-middle of the night death)
So I tell the parents at pickup that I will be closed for 3 days to grieve/funeral etc. The one difficult parent called me an hour before opening(6 am and woke the whole family up) on day 2 of my time off to ask if I was open. OMG. Needless to say I was quite blunt and probably sounded rude, but who cares at this point. There are no words.... Apparently 1 day is enough to grieve for a parent.... I don't know how much more of this stupidity I can take...

I'm sorry about your dad, Busy. As for that parent, I would have termed on the spot during that phone call for blatant disrespect.

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Originally Posted by Busy ECE mommy

Just an update on my client who was being difficult about me taking time off when my dad died.
So he died just before the weekend, and I continued to work through my day just hours after finding out he died(didn't feel it was enough to lead time to give my clients notice of closure-middle of the night death)
So I tell the parents at pickup that I will be closed for 3 days to grieve/funeral etc. The one difficult parent called me an hour before opening(6 am and woke the whole family up) on day 2 of my time off to ask if I was open. OMG. Needless to say, I was quite blunt and probably sounded rude, but who cares at this point. There are no words.... Apparently, 1 day is enough to grieve for a parent.... I don't know how much more of this stupidity I can take...

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I am so sorry for your loss Busy...I understand that you want to do right by your families, but forgive me for being so blunt, but the longer you allow this family to walk all over you, the more you are sending the message that it is an acceptable way to treat you. I think your comment about not knowing how much more you can take hits the nail on the head. How much more can you handle because in all likelihood it isn't going to stop until you make it and put a stop to it. Best of luck with everything. A bad family is hard enough for anyone to deal with let alone when you are going through your own personal struggles. I hope you have lots of supportive people in your life to help you through this difficult time and that you are able to take the next steps towards what is best for you by cutting these kinds of people out of your life. You deserve better and they don't deserve you.

I am so sorry that you are going through this. I recently went through something similar as my sister was dying, very quickly, of cancer. I do not have anything in my contract for bereavement, but I will now.

As for that parent, I agree with the other posters, kick her/him to the curb. They clearly have zero empathy. You don't need to deal with someone like that during this difficult time.

I was very lucky that all of my families were very understanding. I took five or six days to care for her and for the funeral. I managed to get a fellow ece to supply for two days, I did not charge for the days that I was closed. However, I know that's not an option for everyone. I wish you all the best.