Some parents who don't want to be around their kids

LOL!!! Seriously??? I travel every year....by myself. I'm a dedicated mother who loves her children very much. Going away for 2 or 3 weeks per year max does not, in any way make me a part time parent or mean that I'm having a hard time mothering. Quite the opposite actually. I think I've got a few things sorted out that you may not have yet. I'm a very happy, independent woman who has sorted out her life, raised her children (who are in fact well adjusted and happy) and has come to the valuable realization that my identity is not entirely wrapped up in my children. Because someday those kids are going to move on. It's a good idea to have a good grasp on who you are aside from Mummy before that happens...and be damned sure you like it, or the empty nest is going to hit hard!

Jesus....that was quite a statement. Wow....don't fall off that high horse and get a concussion!

As a mother....I am teaching my children that they can be anything they want!! They don't have to be pigeon holed into one thing. I am teaching them that everyone does things differently and that it's ok. Different isn't better or worse.

People who are confident in their own choices and decisions don't need to put others down for theirs.

wow did this discussion ever get side tracked!! LOL

LOL....I was thinking the same thing. OR, we could say it evolved :) Yeah, that sounds better.

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Originally Posted by bright sparks

I am still married yes. 12 years this June. My husband is 10 years older and fortunately very patient and supportive. I am currently suffering from PTSD and have developed a phobia surrounding the safety of my kids which is likely a product of my closeness to them and developing a subconscious dependency on them due to the neglect I experienced as a child. Kind of ironic that I should be caring for other children with no issues at all but my own children I literally have a "worse case scenario" playing on loop if they aren't at least in my vicinity. I desperately need to do what you said. I am just full of fear. I really want to go to the women's retreat, alone, on pelee island this summer. Fingers crossed I can find the courage.

Identity crisis is putting things lightly. I am enrolling in Uni for September 2015 taking Psychology and Sexuality and I swear to god I will be putting that before everything else. My kids will be 14 and 13 then and I think it will do them a lot of good to not have me around half as much. It will be best for my whole family before everything with me hits the fan. It takes so much mental energy to keep myself together for work, which I believe I do a terrific job of doing, but it comes at a heavy price. Thanks for your kind words ladies :flower:

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I took a course in Sexuality when I was in university and it was very interesting.

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Originally Posted by cfred

Amanda, if you're looking for places to go in the future, don't hesitate to ask. I've traveled quite a bit to the Caribbean and a bit to Central America and my boyfriend grew up on St. Maarten, Aruba and Curacao. We've got little islands dialed for ya :)

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Thanks, we found it very overwhelming trying to pick a place to go. My husband is from Congo in Africa, which unfortunately isn't too helpful in the travel department as I won't be going there any time soon!

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Originally Posted by adaycarelady

I'm sorry to hear so many of you are having a hard time with motherhood :(

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What an immature and hurtful comment. Honestly there really is nothing wrong with disagreeing with each other, there are a lot of us here who are mothers and I bet you can't find two of us who parent exactly the same. There just was no need to make a comment like that. Most of us come here to have honest and open conversations together and even when we don't agree there is no need to resort to making blanket statements and hurtful comments. Were just gonna have to agree to disagree and leave it at that.

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Originally Posted by AmandaKDT

I took a course in Sexuality when I was in university and it was very interesting.

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I'm applying to major in it. It is fascinating and I think it will compliment the psychology major nicely. There are only 3 universities in Ontario that offer it as a major so I am very excited and also that I can take it as a double too :) I'm going for a campus tour tomorrow!

Ok, you are way off base. I have 2 grown children and if I NEVER had time away from them from time to time, I would have gone crazy. I love my kids more that anything and I totally enjoy their company, but that doesn't mean I couldn't have say, a weekend away with my husband to reconnect.

As one other lady said, what are you going to do when you have an empty nest? Do you have your own hobbies and outside interests besides staying home with your kids?

The original post was about dcp's sending us their kids every single time they had a day or holidays off. And that I totally agree with. But you have taken it too far. Just because you don't enjoy a trip here or there without kids over the years, doesn't mean these ladies are worse of a mother than you are. And they aren't saying that they don't spend time or other trips with their kids either.

Oh for the love of Pete! You cannot equate a parent taking some days off or a vacation without their kids with neglectful parenting. That is absolutely ridiculous! And no, I'm not watching Dr. Phil at nap. Frankly, I think he's a pretentious, egotistical man and, at times, find him to be full of crap. I'm busy at nap time playing cards or having a conversation with my son who comes home for lunch.

Yep, probably best to agree to disagree. Clearly, none of us with a life beyond home can measure up...lol. I'm highly skeptical of those who claim to be the most knowledgeable about things. I've been dating long enough and heard enough men brag about their 'capabilities' to know that most people like that are generally not all that and a bag of chips....the same can be said for many things.

It's probably time for this thread to come to an end.