Really?!

I've been a part of a couple different forums of daycare support. I have to say that honesty is always wanted and some times you hear things that you don't want to hear but we may just need to in getting a different perspective. I think at the end of it all needs to delivered in a way that isn't being rude of offensive to the person asking.
In my cyber travels around to a few different daycare provider sites I have found that there were more negative, daycare hating providers on it instead of just venting for those things we all experience from time to time. Yes, we all have the those days where we hate our jobs and or a child in our care is pushing us to our limits and or parents doing something against our policies and we need some support to vent. We don't have co- workers and lean on each other for that. I find it sad that so many providers out there hated their jobs, hated the kids in their care and felt that at the end of the day having the kids just fed, kept clean and returned in one piece is their goal and feel it's very sad.
It's true when I read here once that another provider put after they know what they do about daycare, they wouldn't put their own kids in care. So true you know and so sad!
We are all in daycare for different reasons, one not better than the other but today I thought how sad to have been reading so many negative things.

This site has some great positive energy and thanks for that!! I've always valued the different view on this one and other sites just I guess finding myself disapointed and we all wonder why parents take so long to choose a provider.......

Well-said jec. I so appreciate the support and camaraderie on this site. I'm certain that being part of this site has helped me to have a relatively smooth transition to this career!

It is truly sad that there is that element to home daycare (or any childcare/school setting, for that matter); those that are in it for the wrong reasons (warehousing for financial gain) are burning out or are just really unprepared to even think of starting or running a daycare. I had such rose colored glasses when I first had thoughts of starting a daycare...days spent in my 'yoga' pants, days spents painting, playing with playdough and crafting, sunny happy children all the time...and, most importantly having well behaved, well adjusted children of my own, all the better for having their parent at home. While all of that is true some of the time, I never imagined that this IS NOT EASY. There is so much more to this job. Honestly, it is always in the back of my mind, whether it be in an online forum, outside in the yard, inside with the windows open or with my little DCKs eyes & ears always at the ready, at the park...whatever...my actions, be it verbal or physical are being scrutinized & very clearly effect 5 little ones. If these people are so negative/hating their job in a open forum (where anyone can read it); what the heck are they like at home behind closed doors?

If all of my daycare kids were mine and I had total control over their lives life would be great - at least most of the time. It isn't so much we don't like the kids or our jobs or any other thing that we can change. We are dealing with the results of someone else's parenting and while we can often find parents with similar values there will always be differences in how we approach everything from self feeding to learning to play etc. Even the complaints about naptime issues or toileting issues, or hard to transition are really complaints about another adult's parenting skills that is directly affecting our lives and that is over and beyond the late pick ups and late payments.

In any profession there are workplaces that are great and some not so great and around the water cooler and lunch room you will always find someone complaining about something. That is why many left their jobs to become self employed.

We all like to think we do the best job possible and because of that there is also the element if I do something different than you do that I am right and you are wrong and that is a natural consequence of different parenting styles. Yes it is necessary to be sensitive when posting but sometimes it is the provider that is their own worst enemy and once they know the real truth there is a hope of them moving forward instead of complaining over and over about the same situation.

We all start this job with values and ideals that are pretty much unattainable. Long term survival in any profession means finding the balance between ideals and reality and chatting with someone who has that long term perspective can help a newby overcome or avoid the earaly pitfalls in this business.

Check out some of the mommy forums and you will find the same negativity - we are afterall just moms with a whole whack of kids to deal with - including in too many cases adults that act like their kids or worse too.

I think too that by the time a provider can scrape up a few minutes to check the forum they are overwhelmed themselves before they even start to comment so a great part about what is posted needs to be read for what it is saying as well as what it isn't saying - the read between the lines sort of thing.

I once met an older woman who was a Nanny for 2 older kids. We got to talking and she had told me something that always sticks in my mind. She said "Its a hard job being with children all day, but you have to enjoy it. The kids can tell if you don't."
I always think of that when I am having a crappy day, I try to not let it show. I will have perma grin and overly exagerrate happy happy tones!! When Im having a hard day, I gather the kids and I sing them songs that they love. the get smiling and dancing around, the babies are 'dancing' on their bums! It is so cute! The dishes are still in my sink and my floor is still not swept, but I find that I have to let it all go and smile alot to really enjoy doing what I do!

I agree with you dream...it's a lot tougher than I thought but, like most jobs- any job it can burn you out if you let it. It's been a balancing act for me lately to find that middle ground where I'm running my business in a professional manner but, it's can't ways be my way or the high way. We are dealing with kids/families but I've come to learn through the help of other providers on this site and the others that I'm talking about, when it comes to our policies - we need to stick to them. At least for me, that rings truth.

I'm not perfect- far from it and I was on my way to burning out trying to do all that you said above. In my yoga pants ( actually still in those :laugh: ) painting every day, spending every day filled with lots to do. I found out that I'm going to burn out that way and not letting the kids be kids. I've been a work in progress and so is my daycare but my intentions are there and I wonder about some of these other posters who just seem to be so negative. I woudn't want to leave my kids in the care of someone who kept doing it because they just didn't want to work for someone else and or can't make this type of money somewhere else.

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Originally Posted by playfelt

If all of my daycare kids were mine and I had total control over their lives life would be great - at least most of the time. It isn't so much we don't like the kids or our jobs or any other thing that we can change. We are dealing with the results of someone else's parenting and while we can often find parents with similar values there will always be differences in how we approach everything from self feeding to learning to play etc. Even the complaints about naptime issues or toileting issues, or hard to transition are really complaints about another adult's parenting skills that is directly affecting our lives and that is over and beyond the late pick ups and late payments.

In any profession there are workplaces that are great and some not so great and around the water cooler and lunch room you will always find someone complaining about something. That is why many left their jobs to become self employed.

We all like to think we do the best job possible and because of that there is also the element if I do something different than you do that I am right and you are wrong and that is a natural consequence of different parenting styles. Yes it is necessary to be sensitive when posting but sometimes it is the provider that is their own worst enemy and once they know the real truth there is a hope of them moving forward instead of complaining over and over about the same situation.

We all start this job with values and ideals that are pretty much unattainable. Long term survival in any profession means finding the balance between ideals and reality and chatting with someone who has that long term perspective can help a newby overcome or avoid the earaly pitfalls in this business.

Check out some of the mommy forums and you will find the same negativity - we are afterall just moms with a whole whack of kids to deal with - including in too many cases adults that act like their kids or worse too.

I think too that by the time a provider can scrape up a few minutes to check the forum they are overwhelmed themselves before they even start to comment so a great part about what is posted needs to be read for what it is saying as well as what it isn't saying - the read between the lines sort of thing.

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I agree with what you say playfelt- at the water cooler there is always someone complaining about something and we are all here to vent and get support as I mentioned. I just find too many posters are really hating their jobs. I'm not saying that it's you directly- you mentioned that it's not that you don't like the kids or your job. I'm just saying ...there are too many that seem to hate their jobs and say so ....say it's OK to just just let them all be in one room by themselves and just ensure they are fed, cleaned and returned home OK.

I just recently found the site of one provider who protrays themselves in a VERY VERY different light on their idea of how to run a daycare- the vision of their daycare and then listening to them hate their job with a passion I guess struck a cord with me.

This job is no different really than my last. I'm dealing with clients who paid late, didn't do certain forms on time, not following some procedures. Anyone can burn out at any job and like you said playfelt ~ ' Long term survival in any profession means finding the balance between ideals and reality and chatting with someone who has that long term perspective can help a newby overcome or avoid the earaly pitfalls in this business '

For myself, finding the support has been amazing and I'm not sure where I'd be without it.

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Originally Posted by jec

....chatting with someone who has that long term perspective can help a newby overcome or avoid the earaly pitfalls in this business '

For myself, finding the support has been amazing and I'm not sure where I'd be without it.

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Same here :)
Whenever I have a problem situation, my husband looks at me and says: "better go ask the girls on your forum" :laugh:

Wow! In my opinion this is not just a "job". I think that's why we all feel "under-aknowledged" when we are referred to as "babysitter" (that's a job) a babysitter does the job because they can "handle" a kid and they do it because at the end of the night...they get paid for it! Quick money! WE are Day Care Provider's, it is more than a job, it is a profession, I consider it a "trade" we do it because we enjoy it. It is a career not a job. It takes training and time to master. I take my position in my Day Care just as serious as my position in my Family. I am a Mother and a Wife and a Day Care provider alike, that is my career. I do it because I LOVE IT! I can't imagine anything else...I feel this is what I was meant to do and honestly feel blessed to have found this position in life. That being said....I am also human, I have weak points just as the high ones and am very greatful to have such a group of women to hear what I have to say, good, bad and ugly. I am not proud of myself at times for the things I may say or do in life but just like a "true friend" I FEEL like at the end of the day, I am in "common" company here. We all have our moments and needs to be heard, the highs the lows. BUT the one thing I know is: We all enjoy what we do!!!!! Although I have not yet had the opportunity to meet a woman who did this "trade", who didn't seem to love kids and do it for the right reasons...I know they are out there and all I have to say is...what a shame! If you don't enjoy it....don't do it. This is WAY TOO BIG of a role to take lightly, we are raising the next generations. That's Big!!!!!