Bruises on children

I had something come up today that kind of rattled me as it made me realize how vulnerable we are as daycare providers to being accused of something. A parent told me by email last night that her son has a bruise across his bottom and she was wondering if I knew how he got it as he couldn't remember (he is 2 1/2). I have no idea how he got it...he did have a small fall in the playroom on Friday, but at the time he did not indicate that his bottom hurt and I didn't notice anything when changing his diaper. He may have even gotten it over the weekend. She wasn't accusing me of anything, just being diligent as a parent should be in asking about it. Then, this morning, her child didn't want to come to my house...which NEVER happens! He loves coming here (I've had him with me since last May) and I've never had any issues with him or his parents. If I were the parents, this all would worry me...so it makes me feel very vulnerable right now as [I]I[I] know I did not and would never hurt this child (or any child), but how would I prove that if I were accused? Any thoughts from more experienced providers? I am sure I am not alone in my worries....

This is why we are encouraged to keep attendance sheets and daily logs. It can show a pattern of clumsiness, when the child is ill (which could be one reason he didn't want to go to your house today) maybe he didn't sleep well, the list goes on. Our daily observations can sometimes be our lifeline. Document, document, document.

Any time a child falls, wether bruises are visable at the time or not I ask the parent to sign and incident report..Infact in any injury that needs to be noted I do this...scratches, cuts..etc

Do you do this even for a little tumble in the playroom which doesn't seem to result in any injury? I may have to do one daily if this is the case. I have always let parents know in writing if a child had a major fall or injured themselves somehow, but kids fall down many times a day...where to draw the line?

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Originally Posted by gingerbread11

Any time a child falls, wether bruises are visable at the time or not I ask the parent to sign and incident report..Infact in any injury that needs to be noted I do this...scratches, cuts..etc

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I should have clarified --sorry long day for this bird--I document the incident--ask the parent to initial if the child expressed pain in anyway, when the injury seems signifigant IE a head bump, a trip and fall etc where something where traces may show up later I do an incident report

Is this a log you keep for yourself or send back and forth with the parents? I don't do logbooks currently, but I do send a nightly email to parents and extra emails for anything like an injury. This incident was so insignificant that I did not even mention it to the parents...I am not even sure if that is how he got bruised. Do you log every small incident that takes place? I will do what I have to do to protect myself, but just trying to see what makes the most sense.

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Originally Posted by VictoriaChildCare

This is why we are encouraged to keep attendance sheets and daily logs. It can show a pattern of clumsiness, when the child is ill (which could be one reason he didn't want to go to your house today) maybe he didn't sleep well, the list goes on. Our daily observations can sometimes be our lifeline. Document, document, document.

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The key word here is "insignificant". It takes very little for a child to get a bruise - by the way the most common way for a child to get a bruise on their bottom is to fall on a stacking block that has corners - think megablocks.

If the bruise is already turning shades of yellowish or at least lighter in the centre than the edges it is old. If it is still reddish or purple it is new which might help you tell when it happened.

It can also be the parent knowing that it happened at home on the weekend and not sure how to tell you the bruise is there without being afraid of you accusing them of abuse. It works both ways. Try to find out from the parent when they first noticed the bruise - ie if it wasnt' Friday night and they weren't concerned enough about it to contact you immediately then again it likely happened over the weekend from an "insignificant" fall onto a toy.

If the parent was asking the child about the bruise and what happened at your house they may have actually scared the child themselves. Also because of the conversation it made the drop off longer than usual so out of routine, it's monday, lots of reasons for the behaviour but yes conclusions would be drawn for sure.

If the child fell during playtime in the morning then by the time you changed the diaper after naptime there should have been a bruise. A bruise happens immediately because all it is is a small burst blood vessel close to the surface. Over time it gets a bit bigger if the fall is major.

A parent that was truly concerned would either not have brought their child back or certainly not left them after they protested. Assuming the child is happy when they are picked up tonight then over time the parent will relax and so can you.

One of your best defences in a situation like this is to offer quick comebacks like you just know not like you are thinking up excuses. I know the block one because I have had to tell a parent I am pretty sure that is how they got it many times since blocks is one of the first toys beyond the infant toys the toddlers use while they are still in the clumsy stage.

You have two options:
1) Say nothing, hope the parent doesn`t bring it up again and then tread on eggshells for awhile till everyone relaxes or
2) Come right out and tell the mom that you felt bad about the bruise and spoke with some experienced providers during naptime and was told that it is very common for a toddler to get a bruise on the bottom from little falls if they land on a block or whatever. Then you be able to guage if the parent sort of passes it off or wants to keep going on about it. It also lets the parent know that you don't hold it against them cause it could happen at home on a toy too.

I am assuming the bruise is more the top of the leg where the elastic is supposed to be and not right across the bottom which would take a pretty big wallop to make any kind of bruise through a diaper be it block, hand or other.

You know the parents best, they may have been just asking as they just haven't seen it before and the little one spends his day with you. I understand why your feeling a little rattled ~ do you feel as though they were accusing?
I have a communication report that I fill out daily and email at end of day and any and all incidents go on it ~ comments like maybe the little one had a fall on the mats or bumped into something. I document everything and also have what I call a boo boo log for any big falls and or bumps or cuts/fevers etc. I will take a copy of it and put it in parents bag if I write on it that night.

I think playfelt's advise is great ~ It could happen if they fell on a block.
I would go with option #2 then everything is out in the open and you can take a deep breathe! I think being open and up front is best

Thanks everyone for your advice! The child was happy at pick-up and didn't even want to leave the playroom...the father seemed relaxed (it is the mom who seemed on edge this morning...understand ably). The bruise is not exactly where Playfelt said it would be, but up higher almost near the top...but it could have happened from falling on a mega block as he is in pull-ups and there isn't much padding (at home he is in underwear as he is trained pretty much at home...so even less padding). I did think of what Playfelt mentioned...the parents could possibly be worried about what I will think...in the same email they explained that their younger child has a bruise on his head from pulling a gate down on himself (he is with me too)...so they do understand that accidents happen. I didn't feel it was an accusation at all, but it still made me nervous. I did respond right away to their email explaining that I wasn't sure, btu it could have been that he had fallen on a toy on Friday when he took a small tumble. I also brought it up at drop-off this morning as I wanted to guage their feelings about it (which don't show in the email) and again they didn't seem accusatory and the dad said it looked like he had fallen on a toy (again I think the mom is more nervous...I understand this). I will think about whether to now leave it alone or raise the topic again...maybe it is better to let it be at this point....I don't want to appear overly concerned or defensive either!

I would leave it alone at this point. To mention it again is like trying to defend yourself even if there is nothing to defend against. Assume it happened at home if he is in underwear - ie no padding. And as long as they agree that a toy could be the culprit let it go. Assume dad will talk to the mom as I'm sure she will drill dad about how pick up was. Act tomorrow as if nothing is out of the ordinary, make small chit chat, keep her talking about the weather or comment to child on what he is wearing - anything that prevents her from talking,lol. Glad it looks like it will blow over and the parents seem to understand these things happen no matter where it happens.