Rejection after interviews

Do you ever feel rejected when a family doesn't call back?
I do and I hate it.
These are often people that during the interview make me think that I am not sure I want them and that I don't want them to contact me back....but yet when I don't hear back I still feel rejected.
It is the craziest thing.
Some of them are not even families I would want but yet having those people not contact me back makes me wonder what more they could ask for.
I offer a lot to the daycare in terms of crafts, outings, outdoor time, healthy, nutritious food, new and rotated toys and I always invest back in the daycare in terms of supplies and equipment. I can't even fathom what daycare these people are picking and what is not to love about mine. lol I am not the cheapest at 35 dollars a day but that is pretty standard.
It makes me wonder for DAYS what it was that they didn't like. Was it the house, my kids, my husband, me, was I too happy, too serious, what was it?
anyone else go crazy like this for no good reason or do I need a counselor on speed dial ??:p:laugh:
I am very happy to have the families I do have and often tell myself that someone was looking out for me by sending the right people and yet I feel bad when they misfit people don't contact back

I think it's rude when people don't get back to us. All they have to do is tell us they decided to go with center care or somebody closer to their house or something and that lets us know that we were at least valued, you know? I agree with you.

As for the ones who are rude, hey, we didn't want them anyway! Just say to yourself - well, I dodged a bullet there and move on.

I think it is normal and healthy to wonder why someone would not call back (only as a passing thought though). It helps us re-evaluate our services. However, I think that we could offer the best meals, crafts, environment and so forth as well as have a great loving personality but if the parents or the caregiver don't feel the connection (the click) it just won't happen.
Remember you could never please everyone.... and at the end of the day why would we want to? ;) It is about our families, ourselves and our daycare kids and families.
It's not personal. I can't help to think that if the person does not have the respect to call back and inform you of their decision, you likely did not "click" with them as they do not share the same values, respect and manners.

When we were looking for Childcare a few years ago now, we looked at 10 (big center vs. home). I was very honest that we were looking at others and all stated they needed paperwork signed/ deposits to secure a spot. So, for the rest that we didn't choose I didn't even get back to, assuming b/c I didn't go further re: Enrollment that it wasn't like they were holding a spot. Now, being a providor I do see that a follow up call, although not necessary would be the courteous thing to do. That being said, in meeting with potential families now, I do keep it very low key. A pretty lengthy phone chat then, if they wish they are welcome to drop by at their convenience for a "no pressure/check things out " visit. Then we go from there.

I'm 100% the same way even though you know 100% during the interview if they’re going to go with you or not. You also know if you’re a good fit with them too. It just sucks, as we want to be the ones to say no! LOL

Don't worry, as these people would never ever be your friends either. I just hate opening my home to complete strangers to walk through its so freaking private yet public! LOL

What always makes me nervous are the ones who take all the paperwork and the handbook, ask questions about the paperwork and make a date to drop it all off telling you that they would like to secure a spot in your daycare...then a few days before scheduled start date you get an email that they decided on a different provider! I hate giving out my paperwork. It took me forever to come up with it all that I always wonder if they are just looking to open their own daycare and are now using my handbook/paperwork. I too hate having people through my home all the time for interviews!

I agree Michelle.....I hate giving out my handbook - I put a lot of work in it and my communication sheet and every single time people want to take it. Why even take it if they already are thinking that they may not go with you? I have had to wrestle my bi-monthly newsletter out if the clutches of prospective parents - sorry no way that is leaving to a non signed family since it also has pictures of the other kids at play.

Skysue...often times these people seem interested during the interview that is why it comes as a surprise that they don't contact me back. I am already thinking of ways to let them down easy because I might have red flags but then they don't contact me back.

I sometimes wonder if my handbook (at 12 pages long) scares people off with all the guidelines, procedures. But the I tell myself that if they read that and think they can't follow the simple rules then I don't want them. I am running a business and there have to be guidelines on every situation so there is no doubt when something/if something arises. people have more paperwork buying a car or an appliance and this is a living child we are talking about .

Anyways....I guess the whole rejection thing is like you have a boyfriend you want to break up with but they do it first and you get this "What? You're dumping MEEEE? " feeling.:D:laugh:

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Originally Posted by Spixie33

Anyways....I guess the whole rejection thing is like you have a boyfriend you want to break up with but they do it first and you get this "What? You're dumping MEEEE? " feeling.:D:laugh:

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Hahaha, funny.... and true. :p
I do find it tough, especially when you have opened up your home to someone and they don't even give the courtesy of a call or email. I have to say, though, that when we were looking for childcare, I didn't call everyone back. (I am ashamed....) I didn't want to have an awkward conversation!!

I really, really try to remind myself that if they are indeed the right family and a good fit for my daycare, then it will work out. They will call me, be it now, or later. Until then, I keep interviewing. And I NEVER give out my paperwork on the interview. If we decide to go ahead, they either write me a cheque for the first month's fees right then and there, and I will give them the package to take home and bring back (BEFORE the first day of care) or they can call me back after our first meet and greet and come back for it.

So do you all follow up with people who don't get back to you? How long do you give someone to respond before you presume that they are not interested??

Possibly don't hand them your handbook then! I recently had an interview and I was there 1st, I encouraged them to shop around as finding compatible quality care is really important. They got back to me after a few weeks wanting to sign. I sent the rest of the files to them via e-mail for them to look over before signing.

I find asking how many daycares they have been too as well is key, because if they’re just starting there search then you know it may take a while. Maybe also tell them that you would appreciate a phone call or e-mail either way.

At the interview I like to discuss their timeline as that also gives me an indication of if they are just starting out and "just looking" at this point or if they have narrowed their search down to only a few homes based on whatever criteria - location, price, the feel they got when they called, whatever and when they were looking to make a decision. It allows me to remind them that I will continue to be interviewing and that on the one hand it is a first come first served concept while it also being my choice for the child that best fits in with my group.

If I have interviewed several families and there is one or more I am interested in over the others I will send them an email checking in with them and asking where they are in their daycare search etc.

Most of my contacts are by email because I prefer not to include my phone number in my ads. That way I can think about my answers to their questions and reply during naptime when I can actually think. Too often you end up playing phone tag as you reply during naptime and the mom is feeding the baby or gone out and it goes back and forth and the calls are always when you are busy one of those murphy's laws things. Email lets me do things on my time and I like that it is all in writing so no one can claim down the road what wasn't said.

I think I have a story that takes the cake! :) I interviewed them and they sent me an e-mail the following day saying they'd like to go with me. I said, great! And e-mailed them the paperwork to sign. I didn't hear back. I sent a follow up e-mail saying just wanted to make sure I had the right address, etc. Got a reply back from the hubby saying, oh it's my fault, I forgot to forward it to my wife. She'll get back to you really soon. I didn't hear back. And that was fine because I had signed another family by then. So I e-mailed them saying I'm no longer able to provide care for your daughter cos that spot is gone.

A couple months pass and I get an e-mail from them saying something along the lines of: so sorry we didn't get back to you. Your e-mails had gone to the junk mail folder and by the time we saw them, you had already filled up your spot. If you ever have a part time spot open for 3 days a week, we would be glad to have our daughter with you."

Hmmm. Ok, I thought I'd give them the benefit of the doubt although I wasn't really buying it. But I did have a part time spot open and I had already interviewed with them so I said, why not? I replied back saying actually, I do have a part time spot open. This is the e-mail I got back:

Hi there,
unfprtunately, We have someone now but we preferred you. I think at this point, we will keep her with the current daycare person since we just started this week so don't let us hold you up. We will give this lady a try and hopefully things go well.
I guess we didn't time this properly. We will try this lady for a month and hourly you still have spots open then"

Seriously. I don't know why I bothered replying in the first place.

Oh I agree, I learned pretty fast to stop handing out my contract and save myself the cost of ink and paper until people are ready to sign with me. I now show people my contract all pretty in my book with page protectors, then at the end of the interview when they ask if they can take it I say no, I'll email you a copy so you can read it over.

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Originally Posted by jazmic

I think I have a story that takes the cake! :) I interviewed them and they sent me an e-mail the following day saying they'd like to go with me. I said, great! And e-mailed them the paperwork to sign. I didn't hear back. I sent a follow up e-mail saying just wanted to make sure I had the right address, etc. Got a reply back from the hubby saying, oh it's my fault, I forgot to forward it to my wife. She'll get back to you really soon. I didn't hear back. And that was fine because I had signed another family by then. So I e-mailed them saying I'm no longer able to provide care for your daughter cos that spot is gone.

A couple months pass and I get an e-mail from them saying something along the lines of: so sorry we didn't get back to you. Your e-mails had gone to the junk mail folder and by the time we saw them, you had already filled up your spot. If you ever have a part time spot open for 3 days a week, we would be glad to have our daughter with you."

Hmmm. Ok, I thought I'd give them the benefit of the doubt although I wasn't really buying it. But I did have a part time spot open and I had already interviewed with them so I said, why not? I replied back saying actually, I do have a part time spot open. This is the e-mail I got back:

Hi there,
unfprtunately, We have someone now but we preferred you. I think at this point, we will keep her with the current daycare person since we just started this week so don't let us hold you up. We will give this lady a try and hopefully things go well.
I guess we didn't time this properly. We will try this lady for a month and hourly you still have spots open then"

Seriously. I don't know why I bothered replying in the first place.

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WOW !!!! :woot: those people really led you on for a long time. That is crazy !

I have had people tell me they will make their decision after the weekend or at the start of the new week....so then I find myself refreshing email 20 times a day seeing if they replied. It is crazy. They probably don't realize how it sort of just leaves us wondering.

I wish I could just interview and forget it instead of analyzing what went wrong or why they didn't pick my daycare.

Like others have said - it is personal to invite people into your home, introduce them to your family/kids and then have them not respond. It feels very personal but I don't think parents realize that because they are only thinking of their needs etc

I wish I could do this job without ever interviewing again. It is my least favorite part. The prep work, cleaning, etc at the end of a long day and then to get the angst and waiting out of it = ugh:(

I am not sure how you can interview without handing out a contract though. My contract states my policies about EVERYTHING and I want parents to know all about vacays, policies, etc and make sure they can follow the guidelines of the daycare. No use them liking me if they can't adhere to the policies I operate under - right?

I am not sure how you can interview without handing out a contract though. My contract states my policies about EVERYTHING and I want parents to know all about vacays, policies, etc and make sure they can follow the guidelines of the daycare. No use them liking me if they can't adhere to the policies I operate under - right?

During the interview, I essentially go through the points of my handbook/contract. Since it covers just about anything I can think of, I find it gets all areas covered. But I don't let them take it home. I just have a copy that I use for interviews, with notes and additional questions in the margins.

I send my information home with the parents and we touch on only the major points at the interview as most of the interview is spent on me deciding if they are the child/family I am interested in. I tell them to read it over at home and email me with any questions and remind them that no question is too silly with the idea I understand what the contract says because I wrote it. (that encourages them to email questions and then that tells me what sections are sticking points for them and also sometimes a different way of explaining something puts everyone on the same page). I charge a $50 registration fee and that money is used for printing of the handout, things specific to the child such as their own changemat, and goes towards equipment replacement like bibs, highchairs as needed.