Referrals - love em or hate em?

Hi....what do you guys feel about referrals?

I started off in my contract saying that I found referrals a huge compliment and would give any successful referral (where the referral signs) as a free day of daycare to the people who referred the new family.

Then I had a parent refer me and bring me a family/child that signed and I changed my mind and removed the whole clause from my contract. The family I signed was great but the child itself is a struggle and full of too much energy and is one that I sometimes wish I hadn't signed or could terminate. Part of the reason I feel stuck and that I did accept the child even though I had doubts after meeting the child were that I was worried about the referral and what the other mother would think if I rejected her referral.

Since that time I had an interview for a referral that did not go well. It was so awkward and then not hearing back was so awkward that the mother who referred me never mentioned it again and I never dared to ask her about it again. We both sort of pretend it didn't happen.

Now I have another mother who told me she has someone she wants to refer and I am not sure what to think. It is very nice if someone loves your daycare enough to recommend you but on the other hand what if you interview and it doesn't go well? What if they make comments to the parent you have or make them doubt your daycare to begin with?

The longer i am in business I find that BIGGER distances between clients is good. I like them to not be related to me, be my neighbours or live in my subdivision and slowly I am thinking that referrals may not be a good thing either. What if something happens with one family and then the second family leaves because they are loyal to each other??

Thoughts? Do you get referrals? Do you like them?

Ya referrals are a mixed blessing ... I agree that word of mouth is the BEST form of advertizing and am flattered when I am able to fill spaces without having to advertize - so SWEET and less STRESS!

I have had some that worked out GREAT and others where the client who referred and the 'referral' were NIGHT AND DAY on both values and parenting styles and the referral was NOT a match for the program and yes it is challenging to have to explain 'Thank you so much for sending X my way but unfortunately I did not feel they were the best match for the program and went a different route' ... if they are going to be pissed off that I want the BEST for my program well so be it than perhaps they were not really the 'match' I thought they were .... thankfully that time the client said 'oh thank god I have always talked so highly of you to everyone and when she said she was looking for care and could she have your number I did not know what to say cause I knew you had a spot now - but her child is horribly aggressive and I was worried about my little X spending all day with him'.

Personally I think the 'pros' of word of mouth and referrals generally out weigh the cons and I do encourage them - however I do not associate any 'money refund' with them just my extreme gratitude ;)

ETA I actually pose it to parents that 'referrals help to ensure that my business remains viable because sadly if I cannot keep my spaces filled I would have to CLOSE so it is in their best interest to help me when I am seeking a new friend to join the program ;)

Love 'em! I have two daycare Moms who work at the same company and they have shown all the pictures on my website to all their co-workers and I keep getting requests but I'm full. Same thing happened with another one of my daycare Moms and her co-worker. I have them all on my waiting list but don't have a space coming available for years by the look of it. It wouldn't bother me if all 5 of my daycare families worked at the same company because all contracts are exactly the same and I treat all families equally.

I would never guarantee to anyone that since they were referred they would get the space automatically. It would all be dependent on the interview process for the new people, which would proceed as if they had not been referred. And if I had to terminate the family it should not reflect at all on the original family. Apples and oranges. However, the families come into the interview with trust for you already because they have heard all good things about you and they are always easier to sign on if you want them. So that's the key. Do YOU want THEM?

I have had great success with referrals.
I treat all families the same and if there was a problem with one and or had to terminate, I feel that the families in my care know I'm fair and honest so wouldn't see it as a problem. Like Momof4 says, apples and oranges.

I have one family who came to me as they weren't happy with their provider and that provider was referred to them by their best friend who has their little one there. I think it was more of a personality mix match but their best friend still has their little one at the other providers' place and loves their little one at that daycare and loves the provider....no hard feelings there. It just wasn't a fit.

I agree with you though, I keep my distance from clients. I never take on family or friends ~ neighbours as the line of friendship and business always get blurry.

Definitely a double edged sword... so far, the referrals I've had have worked out.

However, I don't think I would give anyone a free day of daycare. I forgot to say that the other day. It's very kind of you, but maybe you could give them a tin of homemade cookies or something instead. Two of the families I have in my daycare right now were from referrals and I didn't do anything for them, oops!

I have to agree with the ladies who say don't offer a free day of daycare. If you do that, you may end up with everyone referring just for the free day and not because they actually think their 'friends' child would be a good match to the program. Most of my referrals have been fabulous and worked out well, but I've also had one woman refer her friend and then ask me for a family discount if I take her friends kid...seems people will do anything to save a few bucks!

I don't take referrals. I don't like the thought of having to terminate a family and potentially losing the other family they know.

Hmm dunno. I have never actually signed one on, but have had an interview where the family hated my dog and it didn't work out. I recently received an email from a current family's friend who wants me to take her daughter in mid May, or "whenever you have a vacancy". I am a little annoyed, because I kinda feel obligated as the current family knows my availability. Also, I was going to amend my policy that families either pay my part time rate for three days or under, or they pay for a full time slot for 4-5 days a week. Now I feel like I can't do that, because I am sure the current family discussed my rates with her friend.

So yeah...not sure how I feel about referrals. Will let you know in a few months, maybe!

I don't know how you all avoid friends, neighbors, etc. In my one ad I had 3 people contact me that live on my street alone. Probably about 3 more that live in the subdivision. I also have approximately 2 on my waiting list that are also in the area. 2 that are friends. My one DCG starting in May lives across the street! The one I just terminated was a friend. But ya, I'm learning quickly distance is key...

Strange that the distance thing has come up. There is a woman on my street who has contacted me about daycare for August, and we have emailed back and forth a few times. I was out for a walk with the kiddies today and a woman stopped me and asked if I was "Alphaghetti" and I said yes, and she said, "oh hi, I'm Blahblah! We've been corresponding about child care". I found the whole thing to be rather disconcerting. I felt almost violated, her having seen me while I was not at my best etc.

I also find it a little irritating that one of my families lives the next street over. Sometimes in the summer, friends and I will have a few drinks on my porch, and sometimes when I have drinks, I smoke. I never smoke when daycare children are here. EVER. But I always feel like I am on guard...like I have to be professional, even when I am on my own time. I don't like it.

Such a good point. I must say that on our walks every day I wonder if all the parents are "watching" me with the LO's. Kind of creepy. Plus ya, on a weekend, we might have more fun then I want my parents to see... But really I hope that they would understand that as providers we are free to have some fun too!

I here ya ... I have always been bound by the moral turpitude clauses in my employment as a an ECE working in centres not to mention having spent most of my career either working in lab schools where the 'two way mirror' meant you were constantly being watched or in centres with video over the Internet and so forth and now with the College of ECE even though I am self employed still bound even more by the Code of Conduct with that.

I have always felt since graduation that I have to present that professional face in public even after hours and on weekends - well at least 'outside of my home' where others might see me or in today's day in age be sporting some camera to video tape any wild behaviours so it eventually just becomes that way of life regardless of where I am - I am always the Designated Driver when we go 'out' so I do not have to worry about making a poor choice in public that could get me in trouble and my friends and family are always so shocked if I so much as 'swear' because I am so use to having to always be 'professional' so they know I am really upset when swear words come out either that or it is time to cut me off when we are at home hanging out on the weekend cause I grow a trailer park mouth with every ounce of booze that enters my mouth - hence why I always DD when we go out ;)

However the whole coming by your HOME to scope you out before an interview and uninvited THAT would be a huge red flag for me ... while I get that we are caring for peoples children, that clients need to do due diligence in ensuring that we are 'good people' that borders on STALKING a provider cause this is also our HOME where we should feel safe to let our hair down when not working and so forth and as long as our personal life does not put our clientele in any danger it is non of their business if we have a few drinks or are a social smoker and so forth.

I know some providers who I love and admire and are wonderful who have signs on their yard and on their van for their daycare for advertising, but I don't think I would ever want to do that. I say this because a woman who lived in the house next to me came over one day to ask about my daycare because she saw us outside all the time. Thankfully I was full and could tell her that I couldn't help her. She would NOT have been a good client.

I prefer a more distant relationship as well and want people to know that I am a businesswoman here. I did open my daycare in the first place because somebody was saving a space for my daughter and let her down by giving the space away which caused lightning to strike me to give me a new purpose in life. I hated my old job at a medical laboratory and this is the best thing that ever happened to me! I see that daycare provider occasionally but have no respect for her at all and she always acts as though she doesn't know me even though she knows me and my daughter and my grandson. People are so weird!

Anyway, my daughter was a wonderful client but I gave her a reduced rate and I'm making lots more money with my new clients since my grandson went to JK but I miss them terribly! But I can definitely see why people recommend NOT taking on friends, neighbours or relatives.

I do not take clients who live on my street. Just won't do it. I don't like the feeling of having to be "on" all the time. What I do on MY time is MY business. I also don't like to have neighbours, once again, due to the possibility of termination.

Oh man, I have a lot to learn...

I have had tons of referrals and some have panned out and others haven't. I truly appreciate them but I don't reward the referring parent. In this business especially, word of mouth is extremely important.

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Originally Posted by jodaycare

I have had tons of referrals and some have panned out and others haven't. I truly appreciate them but I don't reward the referring parent. In this business especially, word of mouth is extremely important.

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I think it really depends on where you live. If you live in a big city the word of mouth is not really that important. I rarely get families in care who know each other. If anything other providers are a better referral source than past or present dcfamilies.

I have had two different incidences wherein one family left all on their own due to a change of circumstance and then another family I had to terminate and both times another dcfamily (who was either friends or family if the client leaving care) ended up leaving too. It's just too risky to me to have people in care who know eachother.

Heck, I don't even like to take on siblings because of the financial risk. If you are only allowed five kids in care then siblings are 40% of my income. When they up and leave that is A LOT of money lost per week until I fill that spot. The same goes for clients who are friends with each other outside of my daycare.

I can honestly say that it took me a long time to become business savvy. And, also being brutally honest here, but in the last year I lost a bit of my savvy and it was one of the worst years for turnover I have EVER had. And I know deep down that it was my own fault. I broke my OWN rules about siblings, taking people you know or who know eachother, taking on people in your neighbourhood, or, on the other hand, taking families who live far away (the drive gets old).

You only have to get hit by the swing, yet again, for not following your own wisdom to remind you of how business always has to be first and foremost in your mind in the field of daycare.

Most of the referrals I have got are after someone has left my care, so losing two families at once has never really been a problem, for me anyway. In recent years, most of my new clients have been referrals. I can see though how you can get hit by the swing in these situations.