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Too attached....?
I have had a now 16 month old girl in my care since January. She is VERY attached to her blankie. She carries it everywhere with her, and I mean every where. I hate it. She will leave it in the middle of the floor and the other children are always tripping over it (there has been a few fat lips over this). However, as soon as I go to put it out of the way, she immediately runs for it and won't let it go. If I put her in a timeout she screams because she wants her blankie. I'm thinking about limiting the places where she can have it (ie. Only in her crib at nap time) but this means A LOT of crying from her... which is why I haven't done anything about it before.
Am I being mean? Should I just let her have it? She is a VERY sensitive girl, who cries over everything.
Your thoughts would be appreciated.
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No you are being practical and especially if it means the safety of the other children. To wean kids from blankies, soothers etc they are an on the couch activity only. If they want to get down to play they must leave it behind. Otherwise they are free to sit there all day and cuddle blankie or suck to their heart's content but they are not allowed to do both.
For soother I have done a dish in the kitchen they put it in and then if they feel the need to have it they can go get it and sit at the little table in the kitchen and enjoy it, then put it back in dish and come play. Also reinforces that the only things that go in the mouth are food and we only eat in the kitchen in a way.
Try tying the blankie onto the child so it can't be dropped or clipping on the soother to a clip. If she is dropping it then she is also showing signs that she is getting ready to separate from it. There comes a time when it is important for a child to be content in themselves and not relying on extraneous things like a blankie for comfort. Give her a large sandpail with handle to put it in so she can carry it around with her - one step removed from actually carrying it - still with her but not physically touching it. At least when she puts the pail down it is less likely to be tripped over and if you casually keep moving the pail to the side of the room or further away she will get used to distancing herself from it.
Here is a good example of saying NOTHING to the parents that you are doing this at daycare as they will be appalled and upset that their precious has to go without and will not be able to see that it is in the child's best interest. Many kids have given up these things for 3-6 months at my house before they do it at home and that works just fine for me.
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This worked for a little guy I have; I secured the blanket to a little chair. Whenever he needed it, he would go to the chair and snuggle with the blanket. For sure he fought it at first...but I just kept explaining that that was the 'blanket's home in daycare so we always know where to find it'. That way, no trip hazard? Good luck!
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Great ideas! Thanks so much. My own children have blankies that they love and I keep them on the couch for them if they need them, but honestly they are no where near attached as this little girl is.
To be truthful, this little girl is a lot of work. Sometimes I wonder why I even bother. lol
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I have a little guy who comes in with a blankie, he needs it for nap time (which I don't mind at all), but if it weren't for that I'd ask Mom and Dad to keep it at home because it is nasty!! LOL He chews on the corner of it so it gets we, dirty and stinky, I hate it. After he settled in to daycare routine (I let him have it on him during transitioning), he now puts it back in his bag until it's sleep time. He fought me at first and was so sad, but if he does have it, all he does is sit there and chew, and doesn't participate in programming. It took a couple weeks for him to get used to it, butnow he's been here for almost 6 months and he puts it in his bag after drop off and nap time without me even having to ask! Love him! (he's 22 months old)
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I had a little girl just like that! I ended up making her keep the blankie in her playpen for naptime only as she would freak out anytime anyone went near it or accidentally stepped on it (it was huge!). I since implemented a no blankie/stuffie/soother rule except for at naptime. Soothers cause headaches too as the other kids grab them or the child drops it and another child puts it in his mouth.
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Yes, Kangaroo, this girl has a soother too. She does freak out if anyone touches her blankie too. I think I am going to say something to the mother today at pick up, just because she is soo heavily dependent on it. I know she has SEVERAL blankies (5 atleast I've seen), and her mom has told me she will even drag the blanket they have over their couch around. She will even take my kids' blankies off the couch and drag them around until I take them from her. It's not that she attached to any ONE blankie (although she prefers her own), it's blankies in general (guess I should have made that clear in my original post).
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Sounds exactly like the girl I had! She had several blankies and stuffies and things too and she would latch onto specific things at my house as well. She was an extremely difficult child in more ways than that and I eventually had to terminate as it just got worse after 8 months in my care! I sincerely hope yours is not as bad as this!
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Oh, I think we have the same girl then! Lol... on more than one occasion I have said to my family that I want to terminate her for various reasons... mostly due to her constant crying over everything (there's always something going on with this child). I actually am sitting down this weekend to see if I want to keep working with her or just to terminate and give up...
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Yep..same girl! I kept mine until she was almost 2 and it just got worse and worse she cried all the time! Everything scared her...when we went out she would cry through library time , playgroup, etc and ruin it for everyone. She would cry in the back yard because a she was scared of a truck that had gone by or an airplane. She would hit, push, scream at the other kids constantly and show no remorse. Oh I could go on and on! Good luck with your decision!
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Stuffies, lovies, binkies and blankies are for naptime here. Luckily I have found that the kids that I have had get so busy playing that it doesn't seem to matter. There was enough to distract them.
I am not a fan of any "crutch" type habits, soothers etc included. Or if I am allowing it, it's a designated time or place.
Hope that you make your decision and can feel good about it! Best of luck... :D
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I also don't allow any of it (unless you're a baby to have a suckie) - it belongs in bed. My dcg arrives each morning with a sucky, blanket & bunny :blink: this is a 3yr old. I put her bunny on the stairs so she has it on our way up to bed and her sucky with blankie go right into her bag until she goes home! I do not allow a 3yr old to be a baby.
Even the 8mos old I have only gets her "lamb" at nap time...I'll allow her sucky during the day but at 1yrs old...see ya, nap time only.
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Yup agree with Mamma_Mia & MinAlberta. Those items are for nap times only or unless you're sick and waiting for mommy/daddy to come pick up. I don't need to deal with kids issues when it's play time for everyone else! Why should I have to deal with a kid that won't share something?
They stay in their playpens/cots and don't leave. Call me mean, but that's the way I was raised! :)
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I agree also, it's for safety and to teach them to be independent. I had a little guy attached to his blankie like you wouldn't believe so I know what you mean. I always made him leave it inside when we went out and I always made him leave it in a corner of the room when we were inside. I told him if he needed to go over and hug it for a while he could do that but it had to stay out of the way.
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I have a 2.5 year old girl that can be described exactely like your dck. She comes here with her 'binkie' (bunny blanket). She carries it around with her everywhere. I've noticed that she drops it and leaves it behind. When she notices it is not around, she gets very upset. We have to hold a search party for it! lol. I don't think she really needs it anymore. I don't mind giving 'binkie' to her at nap time, but I don't think she needs to have it with her all the time. I've tried putting it in a bag to get ready for home, but she notices it out of sight. It took her a long time to get used to being here (since she is PT only), so I think she needed 'binkie' in the begining. Lately, she leaves it behind a little more.
I am with you on only giving it to her at nap times. My dck will sometimes get very upset when I tell her she can only have it to sleep with, but eventually calms down when she decides it's easier to play with other toys when she is not lugging it around. lol
Good luck!