Child is FILTHY!!!

Ladies, help!

How do I tell a parent to bath their child on a regular basis. She arrived at 6:30 this morning and was quite obviously filthy dirty. My daughter and I used almost a package of baby wipes cleaning her off. She walked onto my mats and left black footprints all over my house.

Last week she came to daycare with the same lipstick mark on her face for the entire 5 days. I purposely didn't wash it off after lunch/snack just to see when she would be bathed again and it was there the entire week!

The week before that she had a dirt ring around her neck...so gross!

I don't want to be rude, but I'm tired of spending so much time washing her off so that she's clean enough to come into my daycare room...how would you ladies phrase something like this with the parents???

I would send out a "blanket memo" type thing reminding everyone that the kids need to arrive neat, clean and changed for the day. If you have a section in your handbook pertaining to this, I would point said section out.

While working in a center a few years back, there were two children (siblings) who showed up dirty every single day, and one day we couldn't figure out why it stank of shit in the room when everyone was clean! A toddler and a preschooler. We had to call CAS to report that the parents were not doing their job as parents to keep their child clean and fed (there were other issues as well). We found out from the preschooler that they hadn't had a bath in over 2 weeks!

I would personally confront the parents and say that their children HAVE to come clean and ready for the day. If they cannot get their act together, I would be reporting it. I would also if I were you, be writing everything down, and take pictures for proof.

No child should have to live like that - fifthly. Poor thing.

"Hey, I don't mean to sound fussy, but I was wondering if DCK could be bathed in the evenings when they are attending daycare the next day. All the kids with their dirty feet are really doing a number on my floors. They get SO dirty during summer...believe me, I know."

Something like that?

As play and learn pointed out I would too report them to CAS, but first I would give them one chance to correct the problem.

Alphagetti had a very good suggestion. I hate confrontation, so I would use that. Poor child. :no:

I think I would report them to CAS without mentioning anything. If you would say something and they wouldn't '"clean up their act" they would know it was you. I had a child show up a few years ago with a clear red hand print on their cheek. Mom (who was a constant drama queen) stated she was embarrassed to have left that mark - chuckle, chuckle. I said nothing as I knew she was too narcissitic to respond appropriately to what I had to say. I called CAS and learned from her "some awful person had called CAS " and had done some home visits. I also called to protect myself from anyone accusing me of having harmed the child. The same for your situation. Do you want the other parents to think your standards are so low you would find a dirty child acceptable? Turns out she had to go to parenting classes. She never knew it was me who called. Hope this helps.

I would use Alphaghetti's suggestion. Personally, I wouldn't leap to reporting them to CAS unless there are other things going on that make you feel the child is being neglected. I know some people alternate bath nights because of dry skin/exzema type problems, but I would expect them to at least wash hands, faces and feet and personally, I feel a child in diapers should be bathed daily to clean the diaper area properly as well. Definitely try to mention it in a non-confrontational way or send out a memo about how dirty they get playing outside in the summer and how a nightly bath is really necessary to keep the daycare area clean.

Ya ~ I would hold off on the CAS thing unless there were OTHER issues that point to neglect verses belief system .... the level of cleanliness and frequency of bathing is a VALUE thing as well as a CULTURE thing .... seriously as a child we only full bathed weekly that was the NORM and on top of that you SHARED the bathroom water in our house my poor older sister who was too old to bath WITH my brother and I had to bath after us in the SAME water we had used just 'topped up' with some hot to conserve water and so forth. Outside of that you just 'spot washed' at the sink when you brushed your teeth.

I am not sure how I would handle it to be honest ~ likely I would just wash her myself if it was affecting the program or myself but save some money and just use a washcloth verses wipes ;)

I already wash ALL my kids feet daily this time of year cause after a morning at the park they are GROSS so our routine when we come inside is to take off our shoes and sit with a soapy cloth and scrub them clean and the cloth gets tossed into the bucket and laundered later.

I too would say something along the lines like Alpha mentioned. When I started the little girl I had would come with the same dirty socks for a week, her outfit to change into was 'glued' together dron dirt. The pajamas were no longer yellow but brown and she had food always in her hair. I did my best to clean her up. Poor thing...she would say "no bath, mom said she was tired" at 2yrs old! Anyways her mother was a Class A LOSER and looking back I almost regret not calling CAS on her because there were other issues. It's very hard decision to make. Unless you know there is BAD going on, I personally wouldn't call.

When my DD was born I bathed her every night if not twice a day and I had friends who did the "doctor says 3 times a week" blah blah blah....yeah well your kid smells like sour milk and poop :p And I'm sorry, once they are walking and during the summer they NEED a bath, they're filthy by the end of the day!

I did water play outside with bubbles in the kiddie pool. She loved it and the water was COLD so its not that SHE does not want the bath, its the parents for whatever reasons. She came today and was still clean as I'm sure she just went home for dinner and bed. I was big on bathing my babies when they were little too. Dirty feet in the summer is all good and totally normal, I know I send them home pretty dirty after a day at the park lol. For now, I'll keep an eye and document all the days when I feel she hasn't been cleaned enough..sigh...some days I really wonder why people even had children ( I have this child for 12 hours a day, its the least they can do to give her a bath!)