One of my friends is expecting to get a weeks pay plus a gift from each of her daycare kid families, is this normal??
Printable View
One of my friends is expecting to get a weeks pay plus a gift from each of her daycare kid families, is this normal??
If you have high expectations, you surely will be diapointed. In fact it sounds very selfish.
:eek:Quote:
Originally Posted by mamaof4
I agree to EXPECT that as NORMAL she is surely in for a disappointment and likely resentment towards her clients if it does not come to be!
While I have been blessed with many generous clients over the years ~ spa packages, dinner and movie gift cards and so for certainly equal to a weeks or more pay and the one year I had a client who'd gotten me a pair of those 'fingerless glove /mittens' that allow you access to your fingers without taking your mittens off to blow noses ~which was so cool cause I has lost mine and that she had noticed me struggling with normal mittens I was so touched and than was shocked to find $20 in cash rolled into each finger when I later went to try them on so an over $200 gift in total and I had been so happy with what I had thought was a $20 pair of mitten and last year I had a client find me an Elf on the Shelf after the whole city was sold out and I could not find one anywhere she had seen one while out in a small town and picked that up ~ the thought she was 'thinking' of me when out and about truly touched me :o
While I feel blessed no I do not expect that kind of thing from clients nor do I think it is normal for clients to do that ~ some clients do not have that kind of budget on top of all their other household bills, some do not celebrate Christmas or 'gift give' at all so do not think to gift a service provider and so forth who might.
In centre care some clients gave nothing, some just gave cards, others gave the generic worlds best teacher trinket / box of chocolates / mug / candle / bath supply type thing and each staff got the same thing and the rare few put a lot of thought into a personalized gift unique to each staff who'd care for their child that year ... there was no 'normal' and no rhyme nor reason to why some parents did gift and others did not or how they gifted.
I take a week off between Christmas and New Years each year. This is paid time off for me and the fact that parents are willingly pay me for my time off is gift enough.
I have NEVER expected gifts, tips or bonuses from any of my families. I have received a few but NONE are ever expected. Paid time off in a self-employed business is a gift in my opinion.
Yup. This as well.Quote:
Originally Posted by Serendipity
Thank you for the 5 minute laugh I just had! :laugh: Sorry, but I don't have rich families at my daycare and that's completely out of the question for me. I'm lucky and very grateful if I receive a $25 or $50 gift card from one or two of my families and smaller things from the rest. That's been the norm for me. I have two dcDads out of work right now so I'm not expecting much from them understandably.Quote:
Originally Posted by mamaof4
Seriously, how can you EXPECT a gift? That's supposed to be thoughtful and from the heart and depends on how the family feels and what they can afford.
The only thing that I expect is a thank-you from the parents for presents that I send home for them and the children, which more often than not I don't get.
when I had my children in home daycare I would give a gift equal to a full days pay. I never went below $50.00 and when I had 2 kids in care I'd often go above. I'd also make sure to do birthday presents for the caregiver.
I expect a thank you from my families at Christmas time. In whichever way they deliver it is fine, I just like to be appreciated. :)
I had a good laugh over the weeks pay too.
I do know HDCP's who brag about their $250 spa gift cards and expensive gifts and they think that makes them sound like they must be really awesome providers. My opinion is that they are just very lucky to have the high end richer clients who can afford that sort of thing.
The rest of us are awesome providers too but have clients who are working class people and don't have the funds to spend on things like that. I just wanted to say we all deserve a pat on the back and a thank you every day.
I also think that your friend will be severely disappointed. I have received some very generous gifts over the years but to EXPECT a full weeks pay plus a gift is very greedy.
Oh my gosh - I had to weigh in on this thread. I agree with many of the comments above - a gift should never be "expected".That' s so crass ! And as far as expecting a gift in the price range of one weeks dues - that's just crazy. :laugh: I certainly don't have the financial means to gift my child's teachers or my dental technician to the tune of a couple hundred dollars. I'll put togther a thoughtful gift that they will enjoy, but it will likely be in the 40 to 50 dollar range - does that make me a Scrooge ? :huh: Maybe I have total savages for parents, but I only have one parent who gave me a card and a gift last year. My other two parents did nothing - and I give birthday gifts for each child, as well as Xmas gifts for each child. (average price 30 dollars) I really wrestled with whether or not I was going to do anything at all this year. I ultimately decided that I would continue to celebrate the special days in my little one's life (You only turn two once, right ? :p ) and I try not to expect anything from the parents. It would be wonderful though if parents would take a minute and just write something sincere in a card - it's always nice to receive praise for the job you do, and it would be fantastic tool to use when interviewing new families - praise from other parents is often what gets you the job ! ;)
:wub:Quote:
Originally Posted by Monday 2 Friday Mama
One of my most touching gifts is a 'poem' written about a child's time here in my program that was decorated with embellishments and framed in a little 5x7 frame that sits on my living room as a treasure and reminder of my time with that little man ... commercial value is likely less than $5 however the TRUE VALUE is priceless ... it is not about the cost of something but the 'sentiment and thought' behind the gift being a reflection of your relationship .... honestly a huge expensive gift that is not something you would enjoy has the opposite effect sometimes of feeling like someone does not know or value you at all and well what a waste of money OR a expensive gift from someone who disrespects you and treats you like crap all year long given like it is some get out the doghouse gesture of I can be an ass all year long but here is this bonus so that gets me off the hook ~ had my share of bosses in the working world like that where I would have rather been treated like a human being the other 364 days a year cause no amount of Christmas bonus made up for their daily treatment and behavior ;)
Like everything in life Christmas should be about 'balance' ... gift giving should not be expected but a gesture from the heart that is representative of your budget ... it amazes me how many people go into DEBT to celebrate the holiday ~ seriously that is so sad to me!
When I worked with clients who were struggling in centre care getting an expensive gift would have made me totally uncomfortable knowing that they likely went without something in order to do that for me and well that is not what Christmas is suppose to be about :(
The one centre I was at we had an actual policy of 'no commercial gifts' so that no one felt obligated and you did not get issues of clients who liked to try to 'out do the Jones' being ridiculous with their gifts and instead we had a nice potluck Holiday party and just celebrated each others time together some parents would give 'cards of thanks' or homemade baked goods to the 'centre' as a whole or they would donate a new toy or resource to the program... it was nice cause you did not get the staff 'comparing' who got better gifts or any of the negative aspect of gift giving!
I have tried very hard to make this the 'unwritten' policy here with my program through my Angel tree program with the kids since I started and last year stepping it up and adopting a little girl from Africa to send to school with some educational info shared in the newsletter about how we have so much in our culture and this time of year it is nice to think about paying it forward to those less fortunate but at the same time I feel it would be rude to come right out and say 'please do not gift me' cause than it implies I expected a gift in first place and well it should be a personal choice if they want to or not ... so I do the passive aggressive hinting about my values around gifts and hope they get it and if they do gift me I just say thank you and enjoy the pampering and if it is not something I can use or need I quietly pay it forward by donating it to charity in someway!
Wow! All my dcps usually gift me something but I couldn't imagine something so extravagant. I wouldn't expect that or even dream of it. Asking someone to give you $175 or more as a gift is a lot. My own parents wouldn't do that. lol
My first year I got a lot of bath products, nuts and chocolates etc
Last year - 3 of my families gave me alcohol ( I was wondering if I seemed that stressed) lol and 1 family gave me Tim's Gift certificates.
I don't expect anything but some of the cards have made me tear up. Just reading something like "Thanks for being so great" made me cry. Simple but effective.
I gift each child between $20-$30. Some reactions are more gracious than others but I still do it and I will still be happy either way. On the last day I am always on cloud 9 looking forward to my 10 days off. I only get paid the stats and a few days unpaid but the rest and relaxation is priceless. :) Still....nothing dampens my mood when it is the last day and parents are coming to pick up. I am practically singing with joy. lol :laugh:
Thats the problem!!Quote:
Originally Posted by mamaof4
We EXPECT them to be on time, we EXPECT them pay on time & in full and we EXPECT them to follow the contact they signed.....none of them are followed 100% of the time so to EXPECT a gift especially one like that is laughable.
I am sure all of us would be thrilled if the parents each gave us a card with a sincere thank you for all we do. I have been fortunate to receive a few of these and everytime I read them I feel joy and reenergized for this profession. A heartfelt message takes only a few moments to write and even if it is on a dollar store card it is a priceless gift to us who put our hearts into the care of their kiddies.
Spixie33, you made me laugh. One year I received 2 gift cards to the LCBO (adult refreshment store for those not in Ontario) and I thought the same thing.......do I look like I need a drink?:laugh: The parents said if they had my job, they would be knocking back a few in the evening. :rolleyes:
Mimi - it was pretty funny and made me wonder when I got so much booze.
The first parent who gave it I was like - oh that is nice:)
the second parent I was thinking - Hmmmm.....that is interesting that both parents gave me wine and :blink:
the third parent I was like - Holy Toldeo! Do I seem that stressed?:eek:
And it isn't even that I am a drinker or talk about wine to them or anything. It was just out of the blue. It was good for Christmas company though :)
Hahaha Spixie. That's just too funny. I have had a few parents give me a bottle of wine as a thank you. However, I don't drink and I didn't have the heart to tell them. My husband, however, has benefited from all my bottles of wine from the parents. :)