Firing a daycare family today

in my experience as a daycare provider for the past 3 years..the situation never gets better. so i am letting go of a family today ..after 1 month.

I care for thier 2 boys ages 13 months and 3.5 yrs old..well this 3.5 yr is telling lies.. a week or two ago, told his mom that i dont feed him. I was ok when mom confronted me with that..then just this am, mom asks if i spit in her sons face yesterday...:mad:

really, yeah i spit in a 3 year olds face..i was so hurt, i didnt even know what to say..and the fact that she asked me if i did it..

i guess i was lucky enough to have some really great dc families where i use to live, who trusted me 100%..that these new accusations just leave me really hurt.

im packing up their stuff today after nap..and sending them a final invoice for monday and tuesday..im just done with it..

now i just had another family tell me that they are moving..and will be gone by September.

Its just one of those days !!!!

momwithahomedaycare

It's these type of families that you just have to move past. Just keep thinking of those families that were really great and keep smiling. More will come I'm sure of it! :D

Sorry to hear you are having to deal with this, I would have been so hurt if a parent had ever asked me that .
At least you are putting your foot down and dealing with this situation before it gets worse.
I once had a boy tell his parents that I hit him ! The parents told me not worry about it because he accused every one of hitting him.
Needless to say, he did not remain in my care much longer after that !

i did it - i let them go and am now advertising for 1 space instead of 2 ..

Dad said he had no idea about this conversation, must of been a conversation child had in car with mom. Boy was upset about me giving him a nap (mom says he loves to have a nap) ...im glad thats over with

I'm sorry you were put in that situation. I hope it went as well as can be expected.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by momwithhomedaycare

.. a week or two ago, told his mom that i dont feed him. I was ok when mom confronted me with that..then just this am, mom asks if i spit in her sons face yesterday...:mad:

---

When parents say stupid things like this I usually look at them and say, "Oh, well, yeah, and he told me that you spanked him and locked him out of the house". THEN they see the ridiculousness of believing everything a 3 year old says.

Good gravy!

You did the right thing though. They need to GO.

.................... ....NEXT!

If your kid came back from a new daycare and told you that they were spit in the face, not fed, spanked, not played with, only watched tv.... you would just disregard what your kid told you?

Well I would consider both truth and lie possibility for sure.

I would right away discuss the matter with the daycare provider.

I understand that it is hurtfull for you not being trusted by parents, but at the same time, they are RESPONSIBLE parents. So a good discussion, comforting the parents, and showing the kid that you guys work TOGETHER but that he is being listened to by parents IS CRUCIAL.

There's a huge difference between an accusation and a discussion.

Anyway... I still understand how stressfull it would be for a provider to hear this kind of comment.

But...it is the parent's responsability to listen to their kids. If they don't and then something happens to them, oh my!!!

Sarah

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Sarah

If your kid came back from a new daycare and told you that they were spit in the face, not fed, spanked, not played with, only watched tv.... you would just disregard what your kid told you?

Well I would consider both truth and lie possibility for sure.

I would right away discuss the matter with the daycare provider.

I understand that it is hurtfull for you not being trusted by parents, but at the same time, they are RESPONSIBLE parents. So a good discussion, comforting the parents, and showing the kid that you guys work TOGETHER but that he is being listened to by parents IS CRUCIAL.

There's a huge difference between an accusation and a discussion.

Anyway... I still understand how stressfull it would be for a provider to hear this kind of comment.

But...it is the parent's responsability to listen to their kids. If they don't and then something happens to them, oh my!!!

Sarah

---

Totally agree, Sarah.

Initially, my reaction would be shock that anyone could think that I would do that. However, now after having a friend in a terrible daycare situation, I would totally be *that* parent. Once, I built a relationship with the provider and was more comfortable- I would certainly be more laid back- but I am sure I would try and ask it politely anyway.

Uh, if those tpes of things occur for me ever I just would say well feel free to drop in whenever you would like, and or I would keep notes of how they did through the day, the activities done as best as possible. I know those types of things hurt, but if you can live up to your "open door policy" if you have one.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Sarah

If your kid came back from a new daycare and told you that they were spit in the face, not fed, spanked, not played with, only watched tv.... you would just disregard what your kid told you?

Well I would consider both truth and lie possibility for sure.

I would right away discuss the matter with the daycare provider.

I understand that it is hurtfull for you not being trusted by parents, but at the same time, they are RESPONSIBLE parents. So a good discussion, comforting the parents, and showing the kid that you guys work TOGETHER but that he is being listened to by parents IS CRUCIAL.

There's a huge difference between an accusation and a discussion.

Anyway... I still understand how stressfull it would be for a provider to hear this kind of comment.

But...it is the parent's responsability to listen to their kids. If they don't and then something happens to them, oh my!!!

Sarah

---

I have to agree. As a PARENT, I'd probably say something like "DS seems to be having trouble transitioning to daycare. He sometimes tells me he didn't eat or that you spat in his face etc. which is completely ridiculous" and then I'd go with my gut on their reaction. I wouldn't terminate a family for discussing it but I certainly would if I felt accused. Sorry for the crappy day!

I agree. I think it is fair to want to discuss such intense statements-and I would simply take it as a parent making sure all is going well and/or making sure their child is in a good childcare situations-that fits for them. HOWEVER-and accusation of such things is a completely different matter. If a parent is ACTUALLY concerned that their child is being mistreated then there is a much more serious problem. It is not healthy for ANYBODY to work with families that do not trust them-because our job requires that everyone (parents & providers) is able to be open and honest with one another.