Printable View
I am just wondering what you ladies say to someone during a phone interview if you are not getting a good feeling and don't really want to schedule an interview with them. It would be easy if there is something huge like a difference of schedules or a food allergy,etc, but what if you just feel unenthusiastic based on the kinds of questions the parent asks, etc. Do you give them a chance and interview htem anyway or, if not, what do you say???
That is when you ask some of the questions you would ask at the interview because you want to get those answers just to get a better handle on the parent. Generally unless there is a good reason like days/hours/ages/ unreasonable request then I do interview since we do have to give a parent the benefit of the doubt too in the sense of they are simply ranking places based on outward things like location, cost, hours, basics etc. and then will interview in person to see what the place and program is all about.
If something sounds off I will tell that I do not have spots available for that age, hours they require, specific requirements they have, etc.
I used to interview willy nilly, but I've become very picky, but I prefer emailing because I can ask a lot of questions and people have a chance to sit down and think about their answers when they are returning my email. I'm not really a phone person. Sometimes we email back and forth for a few days before I set up an interview. If they call me on the phone and leave a message I still email them instead of calling them.
I ask them to tell me about their parenting philosophies and about themselves. People love to talk about themselves. Then at the interview if I've spotted any small red flags I can ask about them. I do have to be feeling pretty confident that everything will work out between us before I interview, but I have to tell you that there have been times when I almost said no to an interview and they ended up being the best family possible. You never know, but a lot of pre-screening is still really important.
Oh yes, I am going to be screening like crazy as I do not want another problematic family/child! I have two families set up to interview for the same space (I usually have 2-3 at a time like this), but I did phone interviews with both first to make sure the basics are okay. But you know sometimes you just get an irritated feeling...I went ahead and booked the interview, but will be VERY careful and trust my instincts. I like to have that phone contact first to get a feeling for the person and it is easier to have a back and forth and ask questions. I will be asking a whole lot of questions. When a parent has just a baby, do you ask about discipline? I am thinking of asking something about what is most important to them in terms of raising a child, but not sure how to get at what I mean. I guess what I want to ask is what they consider acceptable behaviour in a young child...but if they haven't been there they won't really know yet....ahhhhh!
Can you tell I am stressed right now? I haven't felt so stressed before...just really don't want another problematic child or parents who think that rude,defiant behaviour is normal!
Sometimes you can learn things from finding out what their support system is like. If they are relying on their parents or grandparents for support then they are more likely to accept more "old fashion" for lack of a better word methods. If they say they are new to the area and the only support they have is the other mommies they met at prenatal classes who now get together and share baby skills then be fearful, lol. On the other hand it can also be a good source for word of mouth in getting future kids. I do find that those that rely on books, what they hear on tv, etc. are harder to deal with since current child rearing methods are not in sync with daycare.
I find parents ask me a lot about discipline and I have to explain that each child is different and how I approach it and that also gives me the opportunity to remind them that they are setting the stage now long before I get the child as to how that child is learning to behave.
I would ask them what it is they are looking for in daycare - are they interested in play and hugs, do they want a caregiver that takes the kids out into the community constantly, playgroups, museums, etc. or one that stays home. Do they worry about whether there will be enough academic learning in home care as in are they planning to move the child to a daycare centre as soon as they are old enough ( which can be 18 months).
I find when I get a baby that things go a lot better than getting an older child. That child was removed from other situations for a reason. With a baby part of my job is to coach the parents as we go along and often I can get my way.
Watch for how they treat you in the sense of interrupting when you are speaking, skirting the question, etc. which will tell you a lot about the parents and how the child might be down the road.
Thank you Playfelt! I think I am just stressed because I am in a bad situation with a child now and could have avoided it if I had followed my instincts at the interview. Which I guess should comfort me because I did have the right instincts and just chose to talk them away. I will NOT do that again! I will definitely think about the things you mentioned for the interview...I generally do well in interviews and get a good feel for the family, try to observe them with the child etc...but I am now overthinking everything because I want at all costs to avoid a stressful kid!
Okay, now this is really funny. The family I was really unsure about in my phone interview actually turned out to be wonderful! From the moment they arrived we totally clicked, our parenting values (which I focused on a lot) are very much in line, their child is sweet and adorable :) Guess you really can't always tell over the phone!
Glad it all worked out good. Just as we feel we can't really portray our daycare and what we offer in just words it is hard to judge a family just hearing some words - seeing is believing as they say.
If everything fits with wht you are looking for I would interview. Not everyone has a good phone manner. I had a woman years ago who i thought was not a good fit for me but interviewed and she was lovely and her dd was here for many years. you have to meet people in person i think unless there are major red flags.