WFT? . . . . I'm so sad

One of my clients is leaving. The parents raved about my . . . everyday she would compliment how much he learns and how much he loves his friends . . . everyday!

Suddenly she is leaving to go to a French facility daycare (French is important to her).

I'm stuck having to reimburse the rest of the month (not in my contract and will change that) so the deposit may be used for the next two weeks.

I'm sad. His little friend is going to feel so lost . . . .

I was holding a spot for their 5 month old daughter . . . which they still want me to do . . . wont be doing that . . .

if she was so happy here there are so many other ways to learn French!

I'm stuck in a terrible spot financially by a client who I thought had serious mutal respect and even a little friendship!


I/m so sad

This is so scary and I'm sorry you're sad Cadillac. When even our happiest, best clients could leave in a heartbeat, how can we ever feel confident that we're paying our bills next month? We're in a tricky business. Good luck filling your space with another great family.

I hate when the expectation is for long term care, as this client seemed to indicate to you, abruptly comes to a halt. You truly feel blindsided. I have had a couple of these and it does hurt as the child was a great fit and of course the income seemed reliable. I now don't take heed when they tell me they are in till child goes to J.K. because I know so many things can change that would alter that long term prognosis. Fortunately, they are leaving for a reason that does not have anything to do with the care you provided. Ask them to please refer you to their friends and end this professional relationship in a positive, upbeat manner. This client will remember this as she probably does feel bad about leaving your daycare.
Feel sad for a bit, and then get busy filling that spot:) I wish you lots of luck in your search.

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Originally Posted by Cadillac

One of my clients is leaving. The parents raved about my . . . everyday she would compliment how much he learns and how much he loves his friends . . . everyday!

Suddenly she is leaving to go to a French facility daycare (French is important to her).

I'm stuck having to reimburse the rest of the month (not in my contract and will change that) so the deposit may be used for the next two weeks.

I'm sad. His little friend is going to feel so lost . . . .

I was holding a spot for their 5 month old daughter . . . which they still want me to do . . . wont be doing that . . .

if she was so happy here there are so many other ways to learn French!

I'm stuck in a terrible spot financially by a client who I thought had serious mutal respect and even a little friendship!


I/m so sad

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SAME thing happening to me at present. And, yes, I am with you, I will NOT be taking the baby. Not happening. I am not getting blindsided twice. Having two kids in different daycares will NOT last. The parents WILL get tired of the multiple pick ups and the second that baby is old enough to attend the other daycare they WILL pull him.

Yes, sometimes this job SUCKS.

Sorry to hear that. Its amazing how parents expect so much from US but have no problem dropping us. I make it a point now with every inquiry/email to ask how long they will be requiring care for. Are they on a waiting list for a centre/school etc? Hopefully you are able to fill the spot soon!

I have one in care right now that is on the waitlist for the French daycare at the school that she will eventually attend and has been since they moved to the area - ie checked into that first and when that wasn't a go started looking for homecare. They are now pregnant and due in January and wants me to keep the first child part time 3 days a week for the year and then hold a spot from Sept to Jan for the baby and said they would pay something for the hold. But then that is when they spilled the part about of course if older one gets into the daycare for next year maybe we won't need the hold after all....ummmmmm going to make my own plan and own decisions about who gets what space and when. I am not French and I suspected that could eventually be an issue but wasn't getting a lot of bites at the time. They have also asked me about keeping child for the JK year instead of sending her due to the fact she was premature and tiny and behind and well lots of issues for sure.

As much as the family was happy with your care it is the way the waitlist for a daycare centre works. Some are attached to the school and do the before and after care as well and some cater to a specific need such as language, Montessori, religious affiliation, etc. Parents often put their child's name on the list at the daycare centre as soon as they find out they are pregnant. When a space doesn't open they look to homecare. Even though they love our program if the daycare is their first choice as soon as a space comes up they have two choices. Take the space within the next week or go to the bottom of the list again. That call can come at anytime. September, January and June are the usual months for the spaces to open but can happen anytime without warning if a child leaves the daycare the next name on the waitlist gets called.

My point is the move to the daycare isn't always because they don't like or value what we offer it is because they have had their heart set on a different path from the beginning or because they are looking towards the future - ie assuring their child has a school daycare placement for when the time comes.

I think families leaving suddenly is the thing this month! One of my families that also thanks me and was raving just told me they are looking for other care because I won't lower my afterschool rate. (ps it is a very reasonable rate!)

I agree with playfelt. Although it sucks having to fill a spot it has nothing to do with your services. If I wanted my child to learn French I would probably move them when age appropriate too. Maybe the French program only starts at a certain age. I would have no problem keeping the baby either and would assume they would move baby to French when they were older as well. A lot of parents prefer home settings when their child is really young and want larger centre care when they get closer to school age.

Of course, the issues with refunds and holding spots are different and I hope you can clear up your contract to prevent this in the future.

It just sucks

I have an interview tonight and tomorrow and two next week so I'm not worried about filling the spot . . . just . . . . sad that this all happened . . . financially it was terrible timing as well

Thank guys!

Love the support

Same thing happened to me recently ecxept that they gave me a few months notice. I understood because they were doing two pick-ups and drop-offs with big brother being at school and after care. This also assures their space for before and after when the child starts school. They were very sad to leave, but I did understand the decision as it is not always easy to get into the before and after care. Of course it was a child and family who I adored..so it was hard!

that stinks. Did they ever mention that if there was a spot open that they would switch. I also wouldn't take the baby.

This does suck! I'm so sorry. It's so nice when we get good parents and good kids and everyone is getting along and our days go so smoothly. Now, you'll have to start all over again with a new one. It's really unfortunate.

I have the opposite situation. I just gave a client 3 months notice because I have babies coming in and I'll be over ratio if I keep her. It came as a huge shock to them, and there were even tears this morning (hers, not mine)

it's just part of the business, the sucky part of the business.

I hope your next client is even better then this one!

That sucks!!! :( I'm sorry you're sad. It's soooooo hard not to take it personally when we pour our hearts into this work. I'm 100% sure that it has NOTHING to do with your services, and it's just an opportunity that they have been waiting for that works for their family. Still stinks on your end!!!! Hope your interviews go well!

I think the reason it is so disheartening is that a lot of the times parents are not upfront with their intentions. I know that I personally ask EVERY interviewing parent if they have ANY intention EVER of putting their child in a centre. I ask this question for two reasons; one, I want to know how long they are planning to stay in care, and two, it means that our philosophies with regard to care and parenting are likely different. And both of those reasons above are enough for me to pass on them and go to the next family.

I have had FOUR kids, over the years, leave to go to pre-school or equivalent. And I asked every one of those parents if that was in their plans and every one of them looked me in the face and said, "No". Heck one family even had their oldest in care with me, pulled her for pre-school at one point and then when they had their youngest asked me to care for her and I asked them, point blank, if they intended to pull her too one day and they said "No". Of course, they LIED and DID pull her when she was pre-school aged.

My point is, parents will often lie to get what they want in that moment. It's not right and that is why we are so disheartened. It would be NO different than if we had a spot open for 8 months until a current client came back from mat leave, took that new client under the assumption, by them, that this was a permanent thing, and then termed them 8 months down the road. If WE did that we are seen as bad business people. It's the double-standard.

In fairness to the parents when they first place the baby in homecare that is what they want as they have turned down centre care at that point and are interviewing for homecare. As the child gets older and they meet other people whose kids are in daycare centres and they start to wonder if they should do the same thing. Parents do want their babies in homecare but most also question if they are holding their older child back by not having them in a daycare centre ie toddler school.

Mostly any time I have had a child leave parents have admitted to having the child's name on a wait list since before they started in my care or had put child's name on list two years before JK hoping to have a space by schooltime having been told the wait list was about 2 years long only to get in after a year of waiting.

And yes there will also be the ones that completely outright lied telling us what they thought we wanted to hear because they were desperate for the daycare space in our home.

I find I have such a turnover due to maternity leave that daycare centre issues rarely surface because first child leaves by age 2 and most wait to get into centre till child can move to the older age group as it is easier to get in and costs less than infant care.

Same thing here. Parents were swearing that CPE was not for them AND that there was no issue with money (I'm private) :blink: Just last week mom was saying how she didn't understand why parents would move their kids sooooo easily... :huh:

It's sad to see a great kid that you've cared for leave...:thumbdown:

Hope you fill the space soon! :)

Very sorry to hear Cadillac. I know what it feels like to depend on the money you're expecting to come in. I also know how attached you can get to these kids AND their families. As was previously stated, try to be as professional and upfront about your feelings so that you can still use them as a reference as it does seem that you were the perfect fit, if it wasn't for French. Good luck to you.

Same happening to me... really sucks

In about another week the phone will start ringing off the hook with parents desperate for their child to find a space for Sept. They have gone under the assumption child would have a space in daycare centre from the waitlist and now can't wait any longer. Only to find they have a space by Oct. This happens with the school age programs too as families move over the summer or decide to leave child at the caregivers home or decide on a nanny after all or grandma, etc - all the usual excuses. It happens every year it seems.

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Originally Posted by momofnerds

that stinks. Did they ever mention that if there was a spot open that they would switch. I also wouldn't take the baby.

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I knew they were on the list. they told me if they like me they'd mostly likely stay....not that I believed them. it was just so sudden lol

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Originally Posted by apples and bananas

This does suck! I'm so sorry. It's so nice when we get good parents and good kids and everyone is getting along and our days go so smoothly. Now, you'll have to start all over again with a new one. It's really unfortunate.

I have the opposite situation. I just gave a client 3 months notice because I have babies coming in and I'll be over ratio if I keep her. It came as a huge shock to them, and there were even tears this morning (hers, not mine)

it's just part of the business, the sucky part of the business.

I hope your next client is even better then this one!

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did they know this? that they would have to leave when you found other clients? why would you do that? no prejudice. just curious

I replaced the kid's spot last night (part time) great family! tonight I have another interview to replace the last spots I was holding for baby. phone interview was fantastic so I'm pretty sure it'll work out fineI'll end up making more money... so that's awesome. Thank god for my wait list!!!!!

My fingers are crossed for you Cadillac. You didn't deserve that bad surprise so I'm glad it's turning out well. But it happens to all of us now and then.

Lol the first family call and said they are now going with a nanny share (sounded genuinely sorry) lol told them it was fine, no need to be sorry

Last night with the twins was ok . . . . but I couldn't get a read.

I feel sick today.

I know this is the name of the game but you cant help holding down your vomit at the prospect of such a large income loss

I'm so stupid for agreeing so quick to reimburse this family. But, they know people and have nothing but good things to say about me. I thought it best to keep the peace.

so stupid!

You can do this!