Some of you may or may not know from a previous thread, that I was recently questioning whether to not offer early drop off for a family in order to join a wellness program very early in the morning to start looking after myself, which is starting to take a heavy toll on me and my family now.
Well how ironic that less than 24 hours after posting that thread, this family gave me notice. Saturday morning, I got a text asking if we could meet that evening or the following day to talk about something. Well I wasnt waiting all wekkend to find out what it was and I wasn't giving up my little bit of family time for them so I just called the mother straight away. She said she didnt want to tell me what it was over the phone, but I insisted as it would have killed me to wait and spoiled my weekend too.
She told me she had found a provider who wouldn't charge her a retainer or an early drop off fee. Mother is a teacher. She sais that was the only reason why she was moving her two kids. I have looked after them for 2 1/2 years. The mother has always said I am like family and a friend and in hindsight now, I see she hsa done nothing but minipulate me from day one.
I know these things come to an end, but I was really upset that this close to Xmas she would pull two kids out when it wouldn't have made a difference if she had asked for care with the new procider to start a few weeks later in the new year. I asked her if this was possible and said she would have to ask as they had secured the spot, signed a contract and paid a deposit already. I said to her that my only dissapointment was that she dared to call me a friend but knowingly screw me over before Xmas putting me in hardship.
Sunday afternoon, she sent me an email saying they would give me 4 weeks notice from this Monday and then they would leave.
Monday, when dad picks up, he says his wife can't sleep and is super upset, can I go round after the girls are sleeping and talk face to face. I agreed and went round. She didnt say a word, clearly very emotional. They weren't awful to me but basically wanted to overpower me by telling me what was going to happen. He dared to say afterward, how do you feel. I responded with, does it matter how I feel and what I think?? I said that I understand why they are leaving, regardless of whether It makes me happy or not, I just looked at it from their stand point and if money is priority then fine. I just told them that I was so dissapointed that someone who preached so often how much they loved me and respected me, didn't come and talk to me first, or think about how their actions might effect others on a grand scale. They couldn't understand what I was bothered about. The husband said this is a business agreement and that they had never given me the impression that they had any other feelings towards me beyond this. This is the fine line I always walk along by being selfless and going above and beyond in my work. He had the ordasity to say I never did them any favours, although when mum had her 2nd child, I collected her 1st and dropped her home while doing my own kids school run as I new it would help her to recover better from her c section. He complained that I decided not to take the girls anymore on a Friday and they didnt have a choice. I got my back up then, because this was a request of the mothers, not mine so her mum could spend time with them. He also said that he had to pay to hold the spot for his other child even though she wasn't coming. This is BS. I charged mum nothing for a year while her other child came 2 days a week, and then wehen she decided to take an extra 6 months mat leave at short notice, I charged her 1 full time spot (5 days per wk) and she shared this between the two girls. I put this father straight by saying how if I'd charged him, he would have paid for 2 full time spots to hold it. At this point, I didn't want to argue, and didn't feel the need to defend myself when I hadn't done anything wrong. I just told them, that throughout my daycare business, I have always based my choices on how they will effect all the daycare parents, constantly taking into consideration how my actions will impact their lives. I said that its times like these, that it hurts to not be shown the same curtosy in return. They still needed daycare, so what would the difference have been in the grand scheme of things to keep them with me until after Xmas not to leave me financially compromised at this time of year. I am now down $1680 per month. I said obviously, I need to toughen up, not be as nice and look out for me, as no one else will. I told the mother directly that to be told so many times that she viewed me as a friend and as an extension of her family and then to have this happen, really feels like a blow to my heart.
It felt great to say all the things that most bitch and vent about on here to these parents directly. They may not have wanted to hear them, but they deserved to hear them and I was polite, and didn't raise my voice or swear at them at all. I showed them the curtosy of listening to them, and they did the same for me in return.
I will miss the girls immensly, but as they are still here for 4 weeks, I will make the most of them and enjoy doing some of our planned Xmas crafts and activities.
Now heres my question after that long winded back story LOL (sorry)
I have a Xmas party arranged. I have sent the invites out to everyone but this family. Is this an asshole move?? They will still very much be involved and included in the daycare activities but I begrudge spending more money on their children when they are leaving me in the shitter at this time of year.
