Need opinoins - frustrated and don't know what to do

Alright, I'll see if I can explain as best I can.

I have had a little boy since April. I have a son of my own who is now almost 12 months. The dck is 14 months now. Since April, both boys have been sick on and off. There's been about 3 total weeks that my son hasn't been sick. Before this dck came, he had never been sick. My son developped a small cough, kind of flemy about 2 months ago and it's never really gone away. The dck also had this cough, and an EXTREMELY runny nose. Any time I asked the parents about it, they copped it up to teething (he got 4 molars in 2 months and is now getting his eye teeth). Last Friday, I called mom because the dck sounded REALLY bad. He had a bark like cough and flinched every time he coughed. The thing that got me was when he was crying. When he took a breath in, it sounded very hoarse - like he was losing his voice. But besides that, he was acting relatively normal. I told mom about this, and she didn't seem to think it was important. I told her that it sounded like croup to me, which is very contagious, and now that I have a full daycare, I don't want that in my care. She came to pick him up and then Monday showed up and told me she'd taken him to the dr and the dr had said it was due to teething. I have NEVER heard of a kid getting a cough like that from teething. Monday he was MISERABLE! But again, everyone thinks it's just teething. He coughed a few times on Monday, and it did sound pretty bad, but what could I do? Mom was refusing to admit that he was ill.

Well, yesterday morning, my son woke up with a barking cough. He has NEVER been this sick. He had a fever of 102, he was tired and miserable. He's not a cuddler, and all he did ALL day was sit with me and watch TV. NOT like him at all. It had me SO worried. I called all the dck's parents and told them and they all chose to keep their kids at home. I went to the dr and was told her had a chest infection - which I was warned about last time I went in about the cough. He'd said if he developped a fever, it would be a chest infection. So, we were given antibiotics and sent on our way. Last night, he started throwing up and during the night, I felt like he was having a hard time breathing. My husband ended up bringing him to the hospital and what do they tell him it is?? CROUP!!

When he told me that, I was SO mad I could barely contain myself. I KNOW that kid was sick, mom and dad REFUSED to admit it, and now my kid is ridiculously sick!! I know that mom and dad brought him to the dr, and maybe the dr did tell them it was nothing to worry about. But, I have caught them in a few lies in the past, and so I just don't know. I don't want to punish them for not knowing, but like SERIOUSLY! Mother's intiuition! You HAVE to know your kids is sick!! I knew her kid was sick.

So, i called them this morning and was like - so the hospital thinks it croup - i don't understand where he got it from..blah blah blah. They decided to keep their child at home!!

I don't know what to think or do!! What is your policies on coughing? What do you do when mom and dad wont admit their kids sick?? Like, if I'd refused care to this little boy due to his cough, he would have been gone since May!! lol

I don't know what to do. But you know how we are when it comes to our kids. I'm going all mama bear and I'm really feeling quite resentful.

HELP!!!

My daughter had croup as a baby. From my understanding Croup isn't contagious, but the virus that caused it is. Everyone's body reacts differently to virus's. Croup is one of those ways.

I have a child who also had an extremely runny nose for weeks and weeks... it was like a tap I couldn't turn off! It developed as a cough and she had a horrible bark as well. I kept her in care as it wasn't going away and it didn't seem to effect her mood, no fever. She didn't fall into any of the "stay at home" catagories on my policies.

She did eventually go to the dr and he confirmed it was just a virus, could go as long as 12 weeks or so... just something going around.

I think that your son probably caught a virus from this little guy and it probably turned into croup. Your son will have croup for the rest of his child hood life I'm guessing. My daughter is 9 and she still has random nights when she wakes up and can't breath. We simply wrap her in a blanket, take her outside or in front of the fridge door and calm her down, she starts to breath normally and she goes back to bed. It's always around the time she's running with a cold though.

When children get sick in our care we always remind the parents that this is just part of group care... kids pass colds around. We often forget that this is part of running group care.. .our children will get sick.

I hope your son feels better soon. When my daughter had it for the first time she was admitted to the hospital with severe croup and 2 severe ear infections! She was just over a year old too.

Mama Bear is expected! You're only human. :)

It's just so hard! Like, I called my husband crying yesterday because my son was being SO unlike himself and I felt so terrible! I hated that there was nothing I coud do for him and last night was so hard! Seeing him like that :( When I started the daycare, I decided to do it for him (and for myself) I couldn't imagine putting him in daycare with a complete strnager - I honestly don't know how parents do it! But I never imagined he would get sick like this! None of the other kids have it (yet) so I guess my son is just more suseptable. He was diagnosed with bronchilitis when he was about 7 months - which is like chronic bronchitis, so I guess this is just part of the territory. Croup just sounds so bad! Luckily, he hasn't had any trouble breathing yet.

That was the thing with the dck, he had this cough and a disugusting runny nose FOREVER, but never a fever and never feeling ill - except Monday, but again, could have been teething.

I don't know. I've had so much trouble with this family that I tend to just blame them. But like I said to my husband yesterday before I found out it was croup, that our son could be the culprit and not the little boy. But it seems the little boy is always the one getting it first haha

It's hard not to be resentful when someone gets your kid sick, I've gotten mad at my sister in law who is also my best friend, for bringing her daughter around my son when she had the sniffles. I just don't want him to be sick. My mom keeps saying better now than when he starts school, that he's just building his immunity but I can't help feeling like I've caused it and that I should have/could have done something to avoid it. First time moms, eh? Ugh. :unsure:

If you think a dck has something contagious you can ask them to take him to a dr and they need to get a drs note in order to be readmitted to daycare.
I just went through something similar and I am still seething!

It's always hard to see your kids sick. I remember when my daughter had croup for the first time. It sounds horrible! Even now she will wake up about twice a year not able to breath and panicing. It's so hard to watch... and I understand that when we suspect another child has brought the horrible illness into our house we get upset!

Honestly, kids are usually most contagious before they even show any signs of illness. That's the sucky part. They're sick before you can even act on it.

If I refused care for my runny nose girl I would have lost her for 2 months! Some colds just hang on and on and on.

I hope your son is feeling better soon.

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Originally Posted by Crayola kiddies

If you think a dck has something contagious you can ask them to take him to a dr and they need to get a drs note in order to be readmitted to daycare.
I just went through something similar and I am still seething!

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If you don't mind, could you give me a little more information? What were the little one's symptoms, how did you go about asking for the dr's note?

I beg to differ...croup is EXTREMELY contagious, and can be very dangerous. My son lost consciousness from lack of oxygen as a result of croup. His oxygen saturations were so low that he was hospitalized for four days and placed on a nebulizing mask.

If a child has a barking cough and is struggling for air (that's what that hoarsness sound was when he was breathing in air), one should treat this as an emergency, and insist that his parents come immediately. It means his airway is compromised. If, for whatever reason they don't come and get him, I would transport him to a hospital myself. It is my firm belief that whenever a child is having breathing issues, there is no such thing as an overreaction.

I would not accept the child back into care until he had doctor's clearance. But...hindsight is 20/20 as they say. As for how to go about it, you just say so. "I am sorry, I am uncomfortable accepting DCK back into my care until he's been seen and cleared by a doctor, and I'm going to need confirmation of that in writing. I'm sorry, but I have other children to think about, and I'm sure you'd appreciate the same if it was another DCK".

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Originally Posted by Alphaghetti

"I am sorry, I am uncomfortable accepting DCK back into my care until he's been seen and cleared by a doctor, and I'm going to need confirmation of that in writing. I'm sorry, but I have other children to think about, and I'm sure you'd appreciate the same if it was another DCK".

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This is great advice. I would probably say this word for word. :)

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Originally Posted by Alphaghetti

I beg to differ...croup is EXTREMELY contagious, and can be very dangerous. My son lost consciousness from lack of oxygen as a result of croup. His oxygen saturations were so low that he was hospitalized for four days and placed on a nebulizing mask.

If a child has a barking cough and is struggling for air (that's what that hoarsness sound was when he was breathing in air), one should treat this as an emergency, and insist that his parents come immediately. It means his airway is compromised. If, for whatever reason they don't come and get him, I would transport him to a hospital myself. It is my firm belief that whenever a child is having breathing issues, there is no such thing as an overreaction.

I would not accept the child back into care until he had doctor's clearance. But...hindsight is 20/20 as they say. As for how to go about it, you just say so. "I am sorry, I am uncomfortable accepting DCK back into my care until he's been seen and cleared by a doctor, and I'm going to need confirmation of that in writing. I'm sorry, but I have other children to think about, and I'm sure you'd appreciate the same if it was another DCK".

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I aggree... if a child is haveing trouble breathing that's an emergency. And you're right, I've looked it up and Croup is contagious. Just about as contagious as the common cold.

So, I guess I would go back to my policies on this one. If a child is not running a fever and can participate in normal activities then I would allow them into care.

The only place i would have questioned the health of the child is the barky, raspy cough. However, without a fever, it would be hard to determine if it's something I would send the child home for.

My situation was different it wasnt croup but it was a parent that actually had an infectious disease but he told me that the dr said it wasn't that it was something else and so two days later his child comes down with exactly what I told him it was in the first place. Then over the weekend all the dcks (except one) my kids and a set of parents all came down with this disease. When the original parent returned he changed his story and said the dr couldn't confirm it....
So to answer your question .... If you feel a child has something that may be spread to other children you just say to the parent that you feel the child needs to be seen by a dr and you will need a drs note stating that's it's not contagious or if it is what date the child may be readmitted into care.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Alphaghetti

I would not accept the child back into care until he had doctor's clearance. But...hindsight is 20/20 as they say. As for how to go about it, you just say so. "I am sorry, I am uncomfortable accepting DCK back into my care until he's been seen and cleared by a doctor, and I'm going to need confirmation of that in writing. I'm sorry, but I have other children to think about, and I'm sure you'd appreciate the same if it was another DCK".

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Yup exactly!!
I'd have no problem telling the parents (in your case of a constant 'sickness') that come Monday morning you'd need to see a doctors note before caring for the child. As a mom of a little on in the house too I see and KNOW where you're coming from. Sorry, I know all kids get sick and it's bound to happen in group care but in MY house with MY child I make up the rules as to how much I will allow.