Advice - child way behind developmentally

[Buggaboo]

Hi there,
Thank you very much for the advice/feedback. I will try that link www.fsca.ca much appreciated!
It could be that he is not comfortable. I really don't know. I will try the suggestions above.
Thank you!

[Lee-Bee]

Hi there,
Thank you very much for the advice/feedback. I will try that link www.fsca.ca much appreciated!
It could be that he is not comfortable. I really don't know. I will try the suggestions above.
Thank you!

What you describe does sound a bit more than just being uncomfortable and not showing his full potential but it is something to keep in mind. It sounds like you have tried to encourage the family to bring him for longer periods which would have helped (both you and him).

I just know that my daughter (just turned 3) has always been rather advanced and learns really quick but when she is at her preschool (2hrs once a week) she definitely doesn't come off as being bright :-) She isn't fully comfortable with the environment and is distracted by all the commotion so holds back. I just volunteered there today and there were things she mastered over a year ago that she would just kind of freeze up for and stand staring. Even her play is a lot more basic there than it is here at home. I don't doubt that if we sent my daughter full time she'd quickly settle and show all she knows but she isn't doing that for them right now (and she's been there for a full year).

The above mentioned check lists might be a good way to get some info. I would send one home with your kids and have parents return it. Tell them it is for your programming and so you can plan activities to build on the children's strengths and to work on their weaknesses. Do it in a casual manner so they don't feel threatened. See if their answers match your answers (do the survey yourself). If there are drastic differences then it would be worthwhile trying to have a meeting to discuss the noted differences.

Good luck!
I will also note that while in conjunction with all the other red flags you mention the pooping his pants can be a red flag itself...there are many typically developing kids out there at this age still doing it. Could be for a number of reasons. Have you asked if he does this at home? Again, it can be as simple as his being too uncomfortable and overwhelmed to ask for help to use the toilet. As with everything though, it can be a red flag of a bigger issue.

Kids are complicated!