High Needs/Very Sensitive DC Toddler

[JennJubie]

I was the parent of the difficult child at one point. He was very happy to be at daycare, he loved the other kids, but he didn't understand how proper social rules worked. Our daycare provider was a wonderful woman, and was kind and incredibly patient with him. That being said, though, we worked with her every step of the way. If he hit another child, or couldn't calm down, he came home. That was put forward by my husband and I. He had a very strict set of rules at daycare, and he came a long, long way while there. I truly believe it was our cooperation that kept our son in daycare, and he benefitted greatly from it.

[Judy Trickett]

I was the parent of the difficult child at one point. He was very happy to be at daycare, he loved the other kids, but he didn't understand how proper social rules worked. Our daycare provider was a wonderful woman, and was kind and incredibly patient with him. That being said, though, we worked with her every step of the way. If he hit another child, or couldn't calm down, he came home. That was put forward by my husband and I. He had a very strict set of rules at daycare, and he came a long, long way while there. I truly believe it was our cooperation that kept our son in daycare, and he benefitted greatly from it.

And I applaud you for that. If every dcparent had the same understanding and attitude about bad behaviour or socially unacceptable behaviour we wouldn't be discussing posts like this. However, as a provider yourself, you know that most of the time parents are NOT receptive to negative feedback about their child. And if they don't recognize the problem then they surely are not gonna be receptive to working on the problem.

I had a kid once slap me. His parents didn't see it as a problem. That was his last day here.

I do agree, JennJubie, that the manner in which a parent is willing to co-operate is a huge indicator whether or not a continued daycare relationship is warranted or not.

[dragonlady3]

Hi...I guess I have a similar issue. I have two year old twins. They have been with me 2 months and when they arrive, they scream and kick and throw themselves down on the floor. Within a very few minutes of the departure of the parent, they are quiet and accommodating. As a pair, they are uncontrollable and pose a safety risk to whoever tries to hold them to take off boots and coats. We finally asked the parents to bring one from home first, go back and get the other. (They live relatively close) This lasted for a week or so, and things were calmer with the children. I wanted to have the separation take place at home and try to get us out of 'the loop' of unsafe behaviour. The parents started bringing them at the same time again for two days. Dad would bring one the front door and a minute or so later, the other in the side door. OMG...the carry on was worse than ever. I am at a loss....definitely they should separate at home.
I was thinking it would be wise to let the parents know that they have a week to get back on track and bring the boys in separately, or let them go.
We have tile floors at both entrances and the flinging down and rolling around hysterically is scaring me half to death. The last thing I want is a child hurting his head. Any advice welcome.
I should add that I have had a happy home day care for 18 years, and these two are the worst 'arrivals' I have ever experiences....altho ugh they are quite 'normal' during the day.