Give me strength....PLEASE!!

[Mike]

The "looked at" is only if the mother is trying to change and he can't. Why I mentioned that is because a friend of mine has 5 children. Her last one just could not be left alone. She had to be help or next to someone all the time until she was almost 3. I also noticed that she appeared to be a slow learner and eventually convinced the mother to have her checked and it was found out that she has a mild learning disability. They said that would cause the need for attachment. I'm not sure if that can be checked with a 1 year old. If the mother wants to keep her home style as is, that's a different story. If she doesn't realise that in the end, it's not healthy for the child, that will leave you with the choice of continuing or cancelling.

[bright sparks]

The "looked at" is only if the mother is trying to change and he can't. Why I mentioned that is because a friend of mine has 5 children. Her last one just could not be left alone. She had to be help or next to someone all the time until she was almost 3. I also noticed that she appeared to be a slow learner and eventually convinced the mother to have her checked and it was found out that she has a mild learning disability. They said that would cause the need for attachment. I'm not sure if that can be checked with a 1 year old. If the mother wants to keep her home style as is, that's a different story. If she doesn't realise that in the end, it's not healthy for the child, that will leave you with the choice of continuing or cancelling.

I see now. There is no testing for 1 year olds and his behaviour isn't without good reason knowing that he is attachment parented explains it completely. A 2-3 yr old and sometimes as early as 18 months can show signs of being on the spectrum and I have cared for a child who very much displayed many signs of autism but it isn't a given that they have it. Children develop at such varied rates and all of a sudden they can catch up which is what I have seen. A 2 or 3 year old who has to be close to their parent all the time makes me think anxiety disorder which is a very different thing than a child who is being attachment parented although I'm sure if things continue this way it is highly likely this could develop in to anxiety if this little boy can not develop the skill set needed to be away from his mother.

[Fun&care]

I feel for you. It sounds terrible, it really does. I myself raised my babies on attachment parenting, however I always knew I wouldn't put them in daycare. I know for a fact they would have had a very difficult time adjusting. If I were to do it over again there are some things about attachment parenting I would do again but some things just do the kids a big disservice, and I think any parent thinking of putting their child in daycare should just stay away from attachment parenting. I have no advice other than to suggest terminating at this point. It might help mom put things in perspective, and it would save your sanity and the kids. At this point you have to put the groups well being ahead of everything else and start thinking about how the rest of the parents feel about having this screamer around their kids all day.

[bright sparks]

I feel for you. It sounds terrible, it really does. I myself raised my babies on attachment parenting, however I always knew I wouldn't put them in daycare. I know for a fact they would have had a very difficult time adjusting. If I were to do it over again there are some things about attachment parenting I would do again but some things just do the kids a big disservice, and I think any parent thinking of putting their child in daycare should just stay away from attachment parenting. I have no advice other than to suggest terminating at this point. It might help mom put things in perspective, and it would save your sanity and the kids. At this point you have to put the groups well being ahead of everything else and start thinking about how the rest of the parents feel about having this screamer around their kids all day.

Fun&care...I'm sure you remember my old post about the AP and how she just dropped it on me and it was a very refreshing perspective when you made your comments based on being in both a parents shoes and the providers. I thank you greatly for your insight.

This morning mum showed up 25 minutes late. She did text me at 8:45 to say they were having a bite to eat and heading on over but I didn't expect her to be that late. I asked what time he was up and she said he woke at 8:15. There just isn't any consistency in terms of getting him up at the same time daily so he can make it to daycare on time so his routine isn't off at my place. He apparently had a rough night which could mean anything to be honest. This morning I could not bare to be in the playroom with him so I had already got things set up to do baking with my 2 1/2 yr old dcb and my other 12mth boy is napping. This little guy wouldn't sit quietly on my knee so I could help the 2yr old so I put him in a highchair so he could watch. He screamed for 15 minutes at which point the 2yr old was complaining about the noise so I gave the little guy a cracker which didn't help. 25 minutes of screaming and I have put him to bed. He is for sure tired but I don't think that's the cause of the screaming at all.

I think the 2 weeks notice in the form of probationary period is what I will do tomorrow at pick up. I will let her know that he is not settling and is very upset and screaming, which she already knows. I'll state that while it is hard to transition in as he has been doing I was willing to give it a shot at her request. I will tell her that the next two weeks are full weeks so that can be a probationary period for improvement but if there is no improvement then I will no longer be able to provide care as it isn't fair on her son, the other children or myself.